Elizabeth H. Phillips-Hershey and Barbara Kanagy Mitchell

Transcription

1 a You Have Choice! Elizabeth H. Phillips-Hershey ad Barbara Kaagy Mitchell GRADE 5 BOOK CLUB UNIT: BULLY-FREE ZONE SHARED READING 6 Pages No-fictio: magazie article 2008 Scholastic Caada Ltd. V001

2 a You Have Choice! Elizabeth H. Phillips-Hershey ad Barbara Kaagy Mitchell Your youger brother got ito your room ad played your video games without permissio. You are furious! How do you hadle your ager? You may be surprised to realize that each of us deals with coflict i differet ways. Avoidace Sometimes we avoid coflict rather tha deal with a problem. We may preted the problem does t exist, preted we are ot upset, or give i to be agreeable. Some people call this a soft respose because the problem is ot resolved. Cofrotatio Aother way to face coflict is to cofrot a problem directly. Sometimes this is a good respose whe we look at the problem hoestly. But sometimes whe we cofrot a problem, we just get agry, blow up, ad fight. This is called a hard respose. Problem Solvig With this respose, everyoe s feeligs ad ideas are listeed to. People work together to solve a problem, so that each perso is satisfied. This kid of respose lets everyoe wi. It s a wi-wi respose. Illustratios by HildaRose 1/6 You Have a Choice!

3 Cast of Characters Here is the begiig of a script. Narrator Carme Jase Christy Players Edig 1 Christy: (like a sports commetator) Carme ad her frieds have bee playig soccer i the eighbourhood park after school. Jase has had cotrol of the ball for most of the game. Carme gets agrier ad agrier at Jase as the game goes o, ad he scores goal after goal. Ad he scores agai! We wi. That was fu. Let s play oe more game before dier. O the followig pages are three differet edigs. Decide which shows a soft respose, a hard respose, ad a wi-wi respose. Christy: OK. Great. We re goig to beat you this time. (uder her breath) I wish Jase would t hog the ball. I do t ever get a chace to score a goal. The kids play for a few miutes. Jase has the ball ad is tryig to score. Carme is close to the goal ad is ope for a pass from Jase. (yellig) Jase, Jase, over here! But Jase igores Carme. He kicks the ball from far dowfield to score. Oh yeah! That s the way it s doe, folks. (Jase hi-fives oe of the other players) Carme has had eough of Jase s gradstadig ad stomps off. Hey, Carme. Where are you goig?! The game just started! 2/6 You Have a Choice!

4 Edig 2 OK. Great. We re goig to beat you this time. No, I do t wat to play aymore. Everyoe is i shock. They kow Carme loves soccer ad does t miss a game if she ca help it. Why ot Carme? Come o, just oe more game. (agrily to Jase) No way! You thik you re a soccer star or somethig. You re always hoggig the ball. I was ope most of the last game, but you would t pass me the ball! The other players crowd aroud Carme ad Jase. Ohhh, fight. It s ot my fault that I m so good. Ayway, are you afraid of a little competitio? (tautig toe) It s ot a competitio. We re o the same team! You ca practically see the steam comig out of Carme s ears. (aside to other players) You see what I mea? (some od i agreemet) Yeah. He does t pass to us either. Carme ad Jase are ose to ose ow. We do t wat to play with you aymore. You re off the team! No way! Who made you the boss? 3/6 You Have a Choice!

5 Edig 3 Christy: OK. Great. We re goig to beat you this time. (agrily) No way! I do t wat to play agai. Everyoe is i shock. They kow Carme loves soccer ad does t miss a game if she ca help it. Why ot, Carme? Because Jase s always hoggig the ball. He does t give the rest of us a chace to score! You should have said somethig sooer. How was I supposed to kow? (Takes a deep breath, ad calms dow) You kow, I guess I get so excited about playig that I forget to do that. I ca see why you are agry. So you wat me to pass the ball? I ll try from ow o. Wat to try agai, Carme? OK. Ad if aythig you re doig is botherig us, we ll let you kow, agreed? Agreed! The other players crowd aroud Carme ad Jase. This fight could be good! Agreed! Yeah! Carme s right. You do that to me, too. You do hog the ball. (Jase looks aroud agrily.) What do you mea? I pass to you guys all the time. No you do t. I was ope most of the last game, but you would t pass it! 4/6 You Have a Choice!

6 Did you idetify the resposes? 1Edig #1 is a soft respose ad the coflict is ot resolved. But sometimes walkig away is helpful. People might be too agry ad eed time to cool off. But do t forget: it s importat to resolve the coflict later after everyoe has calmed dow. How do you thik Carme ad Jase could solve their problem? 2Edig #2 is a hard respose. Carme tells Jase what the problem is, but istead of solvig the problem, they each just get agry. What do you thik Carme ad Jase will do ext? 3Edig #3 is a wi-wi respose. Carme, Jase, ad the other players are sayig how they feel. They liste to each other ad work out a peaceful solutio. Here s what to do to stop a disagreemet from becomig a argumet. Ecourage Get the other perso to state the problem: What s goig o? What ca you tell me about? Clarify Ask questios to be sure you uderstad the problem. Restate Oce you thik you ve got the other perso s poit of view, summarize the problem back to them: So you wat me to pass you the ball. Reflect Show you uderstad how the other perso is feelig: I ca see why you are agry. 5/6 You Have a Choice!

7 These are three ways to deal with coflict. Which way would you choose? Whe there is a coflict, do you AVOID, CONFRONT, OR SOLVE THE PROBLEM? AVOID SOFT RESPONSE Give i. Act ice. Do t say what you feel. Walk away. CONFRONT HARD RESPONSE Scream ad yell. Threate. Call ames. Or: Look at the problem hoestly. The try to work it out. SOLVE WIN-WIN Calmly share your opiio ad feeligs. Liste carefully. Talk it out. Co-operate ad compromise. Adapted from APPLESEEDS September 2003 issue: Workig it Out, 2003, Carus Publishig Compay, published by Cobblestoe Publishig, 30 Grove Street, Suite C, Peterborough, NH All Rights Reserved. Used by permissio of the publisher. 6/6 You Have a Choice!