Most Likely To. by Jeff Mcguire Adapted by Eddie James, Tommy Woodard &The Skitiots
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1 by Jeff Mcguire Adapted by Eddie James, Tommy Woodard &The Skitiots What Who When Wear (Props) What does "success" look like for you in high school? What legacy will you leave behind? In four scenes, representing each year of high school, we explore how things change or what changes you. Themes: Friends, Purpose, High School, Identity Scott Kelly Present Backpacks (stuffed with a pillow) 2 soft drink cups 2 day-planners 1 set of car keys 1 pen 1 pair of sunglasses School bell sound Why John 15:13, 1 Cor. 4:12, Romans 10:1, Acts 20:24 How Time It would be a good idea to do small things to show each year s start, (i.e. a change of hair for Kelly, the walk of Scott). Whatever you choose, this will be a great challenge for your actors. They will also be the best resource to make this look realistic. Approximately 6 minutes Skit Guys, Inc. Only original purchaser is granted photocopy permission. All other rights reserved. Skit Guys is a trademark of Skit Guys, Inc. Printed in U.S.A.
2 Scene 1: Freshmen Year First day of high school ever. Scott and Kelly walk on together looking around in disbelief. They are wearing stuffed backpacks tight around their backs. They walk hunched over under the pressure of the tons of schoolbooks. Both: (amazed) This place is huuuugggee! I know I can t believe it! What do they call this place again? (in unison, drawn out in amazement) High School. Both face the audience and pan their eyes together across the stage as if looking at someone walking by who is considerably taller and much more massive than anyone they have ever seen in their entire lives. Was that a senior? He had (motions to chin and under arm) hair. Whoa. (trying to pull it together) Hey, do you know where room twelve thousand, four hundred, and sixty-two is? Is that the A-wing or the B-wing? I think it s the C-wing. There s a C-wing? This is all too much. My mind can t comprehend all WERMARK the new changes! (School bell is heard) I think I m hearing bells! Whoa! I m hearing them too! Both: (pause and look at each other) The bell! We re going to be tardy on our first day of high school! You know that goes on your permanent record! Run! Save yourself! Run! Both sprint together in wild panic off the stage as if not making it to their first class would spell certain doom. While backstage, remove backpacks, Scott put on jacket, Kelly change hair, etc. Make it look different as possible as another year has passed. Scene 2: Sophomore Year The two enter the stage together showing their soft drink cups, and making blatant fun of the freshman. The tone is bitterly sarcastic and extremely know-it-all in nature. 2
3 They are carrying much lighter backpacks. Scott is swinging his mom's car keys in his hands. Hey freshman! Did mommy pack you that lunch? Huh? Yeah, I'm talking to you Yeah, nice juice pack little fish. What? Are you about to cry? I better call a waaaammbullance! What s that you re eating? Mmmm. Tuna Melt Surprise and a carton of two-week-old milk? Too bad it s not Pepsi from Taco Bell. (Waving their cups in the air, like they just don t care.) Bet you wish you were sophomores like us! Bet you wish you could sneak off campus like we just did! (waving his keys all over in the air above his head, shaking them occasionally as he talks) Hey, Kelly, what are you doing this weekend? I don t know why? Well, my friend invited me to some church deal you want to come? (Kelly looks confused. Scott picks up on it.) Oh! Wait no it s not like we re gonna sit on the front row and be all like, Thou shalt not. No, we sit in the back and make fun of the people who actually shalt not. They always seem like a cult over there, and I thought it d be fun to check it out. Want to? I m drivin cuz (major increase in volume, begins to WERMARK vigorously flash keys to audience and imaginary freshmen) I got my mom s van keys. That s right, I m driving. Who wants to come, cuz I drive! (Much quieter now) I just gotta take my little sister to ballet practice, (louder again) but then the van s all mine! Well, uh thanks Scott, but, um, Brad Smith invited me to his party this weekend, and I don t think I ll be able to make it. Really? Brad Smith? The senior? Yeah, well actually, his sister s friend is friends with my friend and she said one time that Brad smiled in my general direction. (Beat) So, I'm invited. Sounds like it to me. You re so lucky. Both: (Awkward pause) Well, okay. School bell rings. (Sarcastically) Oh no, the tardy bell! 3
4 (Mocking the freshman, watching as they run) Look at the wittle freshman wunning to cwass. (in Arnold Schwarzenegger voice) Run little freshman before I squeeze you like a tube of toothpaste and then three out of four dentists won't recommend you. Hope you make it. (to Scott) The eighties called. They want that voice back. (sheepishly) I know kind of stupid, wasn't it? Both look around to see if anyone is watching and then they too sprint off to class together. Scene 3: Junior year Both walk on together, day planners in hand, and no backpacks. Totally exhausted looks on their faces. Scott yawns in sheer overexertion. (exasperated) I have been living on an I.V. of Red Bull for five days now. Tell me about it. (Counting off his fingers) I ve got a ten-page research paper due tomorrow, three in-class essays and I m taking the S.A.T four times on Thursday. Oh yeah? Well, I ve got (cuts her off ) You know what, forget it. Don t even worry cuz (a ray of WERMARK excitement begins to show, a break from exhaustion of endless hours of study) guess what s comin up? (Yelling with excitement) Spring Break! Both begin yelling and chanting. Scott pumps his arms circling the stage doing a little Spring Break dance as Kelly does the same. (stops the dancing) Scott, what are you doing for Spring Break? You should come up with me, I m goin to Mexico with (extremely excited) Mexico! I ve always wanted to go! Party-Party-Party- Y! I hear they sell you all kind of mixed drinks, and they don t even I.D. in some places! How cool is that? Away from my parents, and a chance to hang out, check out the locals and forget that these tests even existed. (Turns to see Scott looking a little puzzled and stumped) What is it Scott? Actually, Kell, I'm going with the church I ve been going to, and it s supposed to be a real life-changing exp 4
5 Save it Scott. (Beat) Oh, my gosh they ve sucked you in, haven t they? So the rumors are true. You have joined the Thou Shalt Not Club. Kelly, It s really not like that. It s so amazing the things I've been learning, and I think it Scott! Save it I said! I m not interested. (beat) What are they saying about me? What? You said the rumors are true. What are they saying about me? (a little uncomfortable) Well, they say you are getting a little religious, kind of turning into a Jesus Junior type, I guess. It's so much more than just reli Okay, Pastor Scott, I m gone. I want to study a little bit more before the bell rings. (Starts to walk away from Scott.) And the rumors about you are they true? (with back to Scott, beat) Yes. (Head down a little, nothing overdramatic. Kelly then starts to walk off stage) You want to talk about it? WERMARK School bell rings. Saved by the bell. I m here for you if you need me Kelly. Kelly has already walked off stage. Scott heads off toward class. Scene 4: Senior year Kelly enters the stage alone. She walks to the center of the stage and places her hands over her face. Scott is wearing sunglasses. The mood is a little down. Kelly appears worn out and tired. Scott approaches her after a second or two. He looks as if he is a little unsure if it s his friend Kelly. Kelly? Hey, it s been months since we last talked. How have you been? (sadly) Okay. How about you? 5
6 I m going to class. (He holds up a pen, showing it to the audience) Totally pre-pared. Wow, this is it. We're seniors. We're outta here. Pretty amazing, huh? Yeah, I guess. Kelly, is there anything I can do for you? (looking up at Scott, removing her hands from her face) No. Unless you can give me back these past four years that I ve wasted. Can you do anything like that for me, Scott? (a bit uncomfortable) Uh no I can t, Kell. (in her own world, half way on the verge of tears) I didn t think so I m so burnt out. I guess my parents were right; there is no hope for me. (sits beside Kelly) Come on that s not true. There s hope for you yet. (leans into Scott's shoulder) Is this is where you try to invite me to church for the 1,000th time and I turn you down again? Yes and I don t know. Is it? (beat) I don t know. I just want you to meet someone. Yeah? I'm not that much to look at. You think this person will want to WERMARK meet me? Definitely. Kelly leans into Scott's shoulder as Scott hugs her and holds her. They exit. 6
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