Ted's Use of Diplomacy Saved the Day

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1 1999 by Debbie Dunn 1 4 Male Actors: Ted Matt Discussion Question Asker #1 and #2 4 Female Actors: Christy Karen Teacher Mrs. Feelgood, Guidance 2 or more Narrators: Guys or Girls Narrator : Here is a story scenario you can use to help teach about the need to be diplomatic with the kids at school. Narrator : What is the story about? Narrator : Ted asked to join the pick-up basketball game before school. When a jock named Matt refused to let him join, Ted went over to one of his friends and complainingly called Matt a name. Narrator : That began a chain reaction where Ted got himself into hot water with a few kids at school. Will Ted manage to find a way to fix the problem before his day gets any worse? Narrator : Please enjoy the story called Ted s Use of Diplomacy Saved the Day. Chapter One of Two is called Ted Gets Himself into Hot Water with a Few Kids at School. Illustrated by 7 th Grader T.J. Hutcheson Narrator : Ted had been having the type of day where everything seemed to be going wrong. Narrator : Before school, several of the guys got special permission to play basketball in the gym.

2 1999 by Debbie Dunn 2 Narrator : It wasn't an official game. They were simply shooting balls into the basket. Ted confidently walked up and asked: Hey, may I join you? Narrator : Matt, one of the jocks, responded: Nah, we don't need anybody else. Narrator : Ted was so taken aback that he found himself whining: Ah, come on, man. Let me play! Narrator : Ted's passive response of whining had no effect on the jock. Narrator : Matt simply turned his back on Ted and shot a ball straight into the basket. Then Matt walked away. Narrator : Ted stood there for awhile, feeling stupid. Finally, he gave up and walked away. Narrator : Sitting down, he turned to a nearby guy, David, and said: What a jerk! Narrator : David nodded sympathetically and changed the subject. Ted slowly stewed.

3 1999 by Debbie Dunn 3 Narrator : When Ted got to homeroom, he found that Ben was sitting in the seat where he normally liked to sit. It was the one by the computer. Narrator : Ted had been counting on soothing his rattled nerves with a quick game of computer solitaire; however, Ben was already playing. Ted ordered: Let me play after you're done! Narrator : Ben mumbled something that sounded like he was agreeing to Ted's request. Unfortunately, the bell rang before Ted could ever get his turn. Narrator : Ted tried hard not to show that his feelings were hurt. He grabbed his books and walked out of the room. Narrator : Getting to his locker, he slammed the door as hard as he could. This simple act of aggression served to make him feel a bit better in one sense but worse in another way. Narrator : He tried to get himself under control before he walked into his first class of the day. Narrator : Between first period and second period, Christy walked by and giggled. Ted smilingly asked: CHRISTY: What's so funny? I heard what they said about you. I can't believe you would do something like that! Narrator : Frowning with concern, Ted asked: What? What did I supposedly do? Narrator : With a giggle, Christy said CHRISTY: They said you went into the girl's bathroom. I did not! That's a lie! You better tell them it's a lie! I would never do such a stupid thing as that! Narrator : Christy looked a little taken aback by his violent reaction. She said: CHRISTY: CHRISTY: Hey! Don't get so bent out of shape. I wasn't the one who said it. Who did? It was Karen. Narrator : Ted went stomping up to Karen. He snapped: Hey, Karen. Why did you lie like that? Narrator : Trying to look innocent, Karen asked: Lie about what?

4 1999 by Debbie Dunn 4 Christy said that you said I went into the girl's bathroom. What did you say a dumb thing like that for? Because of what you said about my brother. What did I say? David said that you called my brother a jerk this morning. Well, no one calls my brother a name. So I was just getting revenge on you. Narrator : Ted was so surprised that his words to a seemingly sympathetic friend had backfired on him this morning that he couldn't think of a thing to say. Narrator : He watched Karen go flouncing off to class and wished himself ten feet under the floor. Narrator : Of course, nothing happened other than he was tardy to his next class. The teacher gave him a demerit slip. TEACHER: Ted, you are late to my class. Please come get a demerit slip. Yes, ma am. Narrator : Ted took it and slumped into his seat, feeling like a truck had run over him. The morning had gone from bad to worse. What was he going to do now? DISCUSSION QUESTION ASKER #1: Look at the page 2 list of the three responses to conflict. Identify when any of the story characters demonstrated PASSIVE RESPONSES to Conflict. Audience, please respond. DISCUSSION QUESTION ASKER #2: Look at the page 2 list of the three responses to conflict. Identify when any of the story characters demonstrated AGGRESSIVE RESPONSES to Conflict. Audience, please respond. Narrator : This is Chapter Two. It s called, Ted s Takes Proactive Steps to Fix the Problem. Narrator : Ted managed to make it through the rest of the morning with no further negative incidents, but he was still quite upset. Narrator : Instead of eating lunch, he asked to talk to the guidance counselor.

5 1999 by Debbie Dunn 5 Narrator : After Ted told Mrs. Feelgood about the false rumor, the guidance counselor reminded him: MRS. FEELGOOD: Ted, do you remember the lessons in diplomacy that I taught your class the previous quarter? Yes, ma am, I do. MRS. FEELGOOD: Try using I Messages on those other students while speaking very calmly and politely. That should do the trick. If not, feel free to come visit me again, and we ll see if we can find another way to fix the problem. Okay, Mrs. Feelgood. I ll try. Uh, thanks. MRS. FEELGOOD: You are most welcome. I hope it helps! Narrator : Ted was skeptical about this working, but he was desperate enough to try anything that would get him out of this hole he had inadvertently dug for himself. Narrator : After they concluded their talk, Ted made it down to the cafeteria in time to catch Karen as she was taking back her tray. Ted asked: Karen, may I talk to you for a moment? Narrator : Surprised, Karen agreed. She said: Sure.

6 1999 by Debbie Dunn 6 Look, I'm sorry that I called your brother a jerk this morning. I was disappointed that he would not let me play basketball and was simply taking out my frustration. I would appreciate it if you would not spread any further rumors about me that aren't true and even better, tell the ones you told that rumor to that the rumor wasn't true. Could you do that for me, please? Narrator : Karen liked the fact that Ted wasn't yelling or whining. He was talking quite reasonably. She asked: Would you go apologize to my brother? Yeah, I can do that. Well, then, I can tell Christy and a couple of others that the rumor about you going into the girl's bathroom was just a joke. I'm sorry if I caused you any trouble. I guess I'm pretty protective of my younger brother. I understand. Thanks, Karen. As soon as I see your brother, I'll apologize. I guess I can catch up with him on the bus. Narrator : Ted was feeling a bit calmer. He was quite surprised that using diplomacy on Karen was amazingly easy. Narrator : After school, he found Karen's younger brother, Matt, about to get on the bus. Uh, Matt. Can I have a moment of your time? Narrator : Gruffly, Matt said: What? Uh, I guess Karen must have told you what she heard I said about you. Yeah! She told me. Well, I want to apologize. I guess I wanted to play basketball so much this morning that I overreacted when you said no. Will you forgive me? Yeah, Ted, it's okay. Narrator : Then Ted used an I Message and said: Thanks, Matt. In the future, I'd really appreciate it if you would let me play next time. I'm really pretty good and I promise not to hog the ball. Okay, Ted. Since you put it that way, how can I refuse?! Narrator : Ted smiled his thanks, boarded their bus, and then moved to take a seat. Narrator : He noticed Matt go up to his older sister and speak to her quietly. They both turned around, smiled at him, and waved. Narrator : Ted sighed in relief and hoped that tomorrow would be a better day.

7 1999 by Debbie Dunn 7 Narrator : He realized that using diplomacy was a really useful technique. It sure had helped to get him out of the jam that he had seemed to be stuck in. Narrator : Ted planned to be much more careful with his words from now on. DISCUSSION QUESTION ASKER #1: Look at the page 2 list of the three responses to conflict. Identify when any of the story characters demonstrated ASSERTIVE RESPONSES to Conflict. Audience, please respond. DISCUSSION QUESTION ASKER #2: Look at the page 5 list of I Message Sentence Starters. If you found yourself in the shoes of any of the characters, pick out one of the I Message Sentence Starters and use an I Message on that character using a calm and polite tone of voice. Let s get several volunteers to do this. Audience, please respond. DISCUSSION QUESTION ASKER #1: Think about a time when you personally were in conflict with somebody else. Tell briefly about what happened. Follow that by using an I Message on that person as if he or she was actually standing in front of you. Let s get several volunteers to do this. Audience, please respond. Big to Medium Parts: TED CHRISTY DISCUSSION QUESTION ASKER #1 Small Parts: MRS. FEELGOOD, GUIDANCE MATT KAREN DISCUSSION QUESTION ASKER #2 TEACHER

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