Anatomy of a Classic
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1 Lillenas Drama Presents Anatomy of a Classic from Body Language By Joe Lovitt Theme Anyone who does anything in the name of the Lord had better take a close look at where that inspiration came from. Scripture 2 Timothy 3:16 Characters Two males, two females RICK: An enthusiastic, hardworking, and funny guy, but also a procrastinator. BRIAN: A guitar player; more quiet and reserved than Rick but still prone to excitement when he s caught up in a project. JENNY: A born skeptic who is familiar with Rick s work habits. SUE: An optimist who would give John Dillinger the benefit of the doubt. Tone Humorous Running Time Five minutes Setting/Props Setting: church. Props: guitar, pen or pencil, pad of paper, sheets of choir music, and music stands for Jenny and Sue to prepare for worship. You will need a percussionist or sound effects person to provide a chime. (Lights up on RICK and BRIAN sitting downstage on floor or on seats near the audience. BRIAN strums his guitar as JENNY and SUE enter.) SUE: Hey, Rick! Are you guys finished? We re almost ready to open the doors.
2 RICK: Just give us a few minutes. We re trying to get these lyrics down pat. SUE: You re still working on that song? JENNY: You ve had five weeks to write that! Why do you always wait until the last minute to do these things? BRIAN: We work better under pressure. JENNY: Then next time put your head in a vise and get it done earlier. RICK: Don t worry, Jenny. All we re doing now is fine-tuning it a little. JENNY (skeptical): Fine-tuning, huh? RICK: Honest! Just a tweak here and there and boom! we ve got a classic! SUE (believing him): I expect to be bowled over. BRIAN: No problem. RICK: People will be singing this one for years. JENNY: We ll just settle for tonight. BRIAN: You ve got it! JENNY: We d better get it! RICK: On a silver platter! BRIAN: The best! RICK: Better than the best! (SUE and JENNY walk away.) SUE: This is so exciting! JENNY (unconvinced): Uh-huh. (JENNY and SUE move around the stage straightening chairs, dusting the piano, adjusting music stands, etc., in preparation for the upcoming performance or service. They continue to do this throughout the scene.) BRIAN: Any ideas? RICK: Not a one. BRIAN: We re doomed. RICK: Now don t get all gloomy on me here. We ve got some time left. Gimme a chord. BRIAN (strums his guitar once): Is G OK with you?
3 RICK: A G? Come on, Brian! This song s gotta be bold! Everlasting! An original! Something that ll outlive both of us! BRIAN: Oh. Like an A? RICK: Now you re talking. Start me up here. BRIAN (begins strumming): This good for you? RICK (leaning back, closing his eyes): Yeah. BRIAN (still strumming): Now what? RICK: I m waiting for inspiration. BRIAN (after a pause, still playing): Don t wait too long. (Another pause) Jump right in. (Pause) Any time. (Pause) In this millennium. RICK: I m thinking! We just have to lean back and let the ideas come to us. Hey, I like songs about people. Gimme a name. BRIAN: Michael? RICK: Mike? BRIAN: Dave? RICK: Chuck! BRIAN: Spike! RICK: Trigger! BRIAN: Arsenio! RICK/BRIAN (after a pause, agreeing): Michael. RICK: OK, Michael s gotta do something. What does he do? He... BRIAN: Walks! RICK: Runs! BRIAN: Flies! RICK: Falls! BRIAN: And he can t get up! RICK/BRIAN (after a pause): Naaaaaaah! RICK: What s he do? What s he do? Michael... Michael... JENNY (to SUE as they work): So, how did your husband finally talk you into going fishing last weekend? SUE: We struck a deal. I only had to make lunch and Michael rowed the boat.
4 JENNY: Ah, sure. (Sound effects: A chime strikes as RICK and BRIAN are visibly hit with an obvious brainstorm.) RICK (singing): Michael rowed the boat... ah, sure. BRIAN: I like it. (RICK furiously writes down the lyrics.) SUE (to JENNY): Oh, no! I forgot to bring that extra copy of the music you wanted! JENNY: Don t worry, Sue. I found another copy in my folder. SUE: Whew. BRIAN (singing): Allelu ia! RICK: Good, good! I like it! We ve got something to work with here! Let s keep the momentum going! (RICK and BRIAN continue to work on the song in pantomime. They seem oblivious to the conversation JENNY and SUE are carrying on behind them.) SUE: Say, did your husband still want you to go camping last weekend with that cold of yours? JENNY: No, he was very sweet. I told him my nose was running and my throat was sore. SUE: And that s all it took? JENNY: Yeah. So, I went shopping instead. There was a sale at Jordan s department store. SUE: Jordan s? My sister helps him whenever he has a sale. JENNY: She s a clerk? SUE (laughing): No, just a really good customer. JENNY: My sister used to work there until she became allergic to the fragrance counter. I wish her health had never failed. I d still be getting discounts. SUE: Sweet. JENNY: It was. But Mr. Jordan still gives me a break on books. He s very wellread, you know. SUE: Tell me about it. That man is so deep. JENNY: He s a wise one, all right. SUE: And nice! If you ever need something, he gives it to you.
5 JENNY: Really? SUE: Oh, yes! He s the one who loaned me that diet book for Mike. JENNY: Mike s on a diet? SUE: The poor man starves himself! For breakfast it s just skim milk and toast with honey. JENNY: That s all? SUE: Oh, once in awhile he ll have a grapefruit on the side or a fruit cup. JENNY: How does he make it through the morning? SUE: Willpower. Strictly willpower. And a couple of Milky Way bars before lunch. JENNY: Incredible. (RICK and BRIAN stand up, very excited.) RICK: OK, that s good! That s good! I think we ve got it! BRIAN: I don t know. I think it needs a stronger ending. RICK (straining to think): An ending, an ending. OK, Uh... (Claps hands) Hey! How do all the great songs end? (BRIAN s face lights up as RICK writes.) RICK/BRIAN: Repeat first verse! RICK: We ve got it! BRIAN: We ve got it! (JENNY and SUE approach them.) SUE: You ve got it? JENNY: Let s hear it. RICK (to BRIAN): Maestro... RICK/BRIAN (singing): Michael rowed the boat ashore. I told Joe my throat is sore. Sister s helping him with sales. Wish her health had never failed.
6 Mister Jordan is deep and wise. Gives it to ya. Milk and honey with a grapefruit side Or a fruit cup. (Spoken) Repeat! (Singing) Michael rowed the boat ashore. I told Joe my throat was sore. RICK: Well? What do you think? (JENNY and SUE look at each other, then at RICK and BRIAN.) JENNY/SUE: Needs work. RICK: How so? SUE: Well, I don t want to upset you, but... BRIAN: Yeah? JENNY (suppressing laughter): It s baaaaaaad. RICK: Bad? Be more specific. JENNY: OK, it s really bad. RICK: But I thought it was kind of... I dunno... inspired. SUE: Well, it s fine to work from inspiration. But when you re working for the glory of God, you ve gotta be careful about where your inspiration comes from. RICK: Oh. SUE (on the bright side): Nice tune, though! JENNY: Yeah, nice tune. (RICK and BRIAN start to exit.) RICK (to BRIAN): Well, let s work on it some more. We re really close here. I don t know why, but in my mind I keep getting this vision of a river... BRIAN: Like the Mississippi? RICK: No, somewhere foreign. BRIAN: The Missouri? RICK: No, really foreign. BRIAN: How about the Nile?
7 RICK: Or the Thames... BRIAN: The Jordan? RICK/BRIAN: Naaaaah. (RICK and BRIAN exit.) JENNY: So, tell me. What did you really think? SUE: Maybe it s just me, but I can t shake the feeling I ve heard those lyrics somewhere before. It s really uncanny, you know, how that happens... (SUE and JENNY ad-lib as they exit.) The purchase of this sketch entitles the purchaser to make photocopies of this material for use in their church or nonprofit organization. The sharing of this material with other churches or organizations not owned or controlled by the original purchaser is strictly prohibited. The contents of this sketch may not be reproduced in any other form without written permission from the publisher. Please include the copyright statement found below on each copy made. Questions? Please write, call, or Lillenas Publishing Company Phone: drama@lillenas.com Drama Resources Fax: Web Site: P.O. Box Kansas City, MO The sketch collection Body Language (MP-765) is available for purchase from Lillenas Drama or from your local Christian bookstore. For a full description of the rest of this collection, or to purchase other individual sketches, refer to
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