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Showing Sentences page 1 Showing Sentence #1: Showing Sentence #2: Is that the best action verb you can think of? (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 4

Showing Sentence #3: Showing Sentence #4: Is that the best action verb you can think of? Showing Sentence #5: Showing Sentence #6: Is that the best action verb you can think of? (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 5

Caves-inspired writing strategy: Place/Thing I will describe:_ Mood I want my reader to feel about place: Things that would not be present: Things that would be present: Draft your MOOD-inspiring description here or on your own paper: (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 6

Homer got down from the chair and pushed a button on the machine marked, Start. Rings of batter started dropping into the hot fat. After a ring of batter was cooked on one side an automatic gadget turned it over and the other side would cook. Then another automatic gadget gave the doughnut a little push and it rolled neatly down a little chute, all ready to eat. From Homer Price by Robert McCloskey COMMON Transitions: Donut/Original Machine draft: First, second, third Next, then, following that Before, after, while Meanwhile, during Both, and, either, or Consequently, as a result Furthermore, in addition Finally, in conclusion (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 9

A cascade of perfect movements, with hundreds of brilliantly calibrated actions, coursed through the mechanical man. The key tightened a spring connected to a series of gears that extended down into the base of the figure. There, the last gear turned a series of brass disks with precisely cut edges. Two little hammer-like contraptions came down and trailed along the edges of the notched disks, rising and falling as the disks steadily turned. From The Invention of Hugo Cabret by Brian Selznik Revised draft: COMMON Transitions: First, second, third Next, then, following that Before, after, while Meanwhile, during Both, and, either, or Consequently, as a result Furthermore, in addition Finally, in conclusion Of the following three writing skills used in your revised draft, which one would win gold, silver, and bronze if there was an Olympic race running through your current draft? Uses action verbs thoughtfully _Uses unique descriptions _Uses a variety of accurate and interesting transitions Who gets G (Gold), S (Silver), or B (Bronze) (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 10

Ms. Durrance s seventh grader s wrote original Counting Up/Down stories. Julius and Vivian share their examples here. Read these two stories and be prepared to discuss the skills of organization and idea development that you see these two writers using. The Duel by Julius, seventh grade writer In the Old West, a local ruffian was causing trouble for the sheriff. The sheriff had tried on several occasions to put him behind bars, but each time he failed. Finally, one day, the criminal marched into the sheriff s office, looked him in the eye and said, I challenge you to a duel. Winner becomes sheriff. The sheriff was reluctant to accept, but he knew it was the only to put a stop to this troublemaker. Okay, but we play by my rules. We start back-to-back, take five steps forward, and then shoot. Agreed? On the day of the duel, the town was dead silent; not even the rustling of trees was heard. Everyone took cover behind overturned tables and barrels as they anticipated an epic battle. The sheriff and his opponent were in position, and the duel was about to start. They took one-step forward. I ve been practicing my aim, but who knows what this guy has got up his sleeve, the sheriff thought nervously. They took a second step. Just aim and shoot, the sheriff thought. His hands felt very shaky and rubber-like. They took a third step. Almost there, the sheriff gulped. He tightened his grip on his gun until it hurt. They took a fourth step. Moment of truth, he thought to himself. The tension was high as everyone watched. The sheriff s legs felt extremely shaky, and he was on the verge of collapsing. They took a fifth and final step. Both competitors drew their weapons and made a swift, one-hundred-eighty degree turn. The sheriff fell mid-turn, but still took a shot. He narrowly avoided a head shot, but managed to shoot his opponent s knee, disabling him for life. The crowd roared with cheer as the loser grunted and fell to the ground. What are three smart things you could say about Julius ORGANIZATION skills? What are three smart things you could say about Julius WORD CHOICE skills? (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 12

Escaping Death by Vivian, seventh grade writer The day was cold and gloomy, and coughs were the only sound being heard from a young girl s mouth. As her parents watched her every move, she lay in bed, too weak to even ask for a glass of water. She had terrible asthma and a horrible cold. Her parents knew she would eventually have to be rushed to the hospital. They were just waiting for the right time. Suddenly the girl took a shallow breath and started to cough. Her parents knew that was the beginning of a long painful journey to the emergency room. The nurse explained to her parents that the child would have to have five IVs stuck into her. They knew it would hurt, but it was the only way the little girl could live. ONE! the nurse shouted. The little girl closed her eyes so she couldn t see the needle. Although still very shallow, she took the deepest breath she could take. A tear slowly rolled down the mother s face. The room was so quiet you could hear her tear hit the cold, sick floor. TWO! Her parents faces were bright red, while hers was as pale as death. The girl started to cry, and the nurse whispered, Don t cry. You will only make it worse. THREE! The girl was coughing so hard it was like she had her own little desert placed in her throat. Wait in the waiting room until you can be more calm, a doctor told her mother, who was sobbing uncontrollably. FOUR! The little girl s body could not take any more pain as death was creeping up behind her. FIVE! The last needle went in quick. Right as it was released, the girl slipped into a deep sleep like a hibernating bear in the middle of winter. Later, her mother walked into the room to check on her daughter. The girl slowly opened her eyes. The nurse told her parents that she would be okay and could go home. As the girl walked into her bedroom, she took off her hospital bracelet and put it into her keepsake box as a memory. It was only because of a miracle that she was even alive that day. What are three smart things you could say about Vivian s ORGANIZATION skills? What are three smart things you could say about Vivian s WORD CHOICE skills? (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 13

A Critical Thinking Technique: The Revision Sprint This Revision Sprint requires students to have a little knowledge of traits language because the racers you assign to this task are based on elements of the writing traits. As students prepare to revise a draft, they first run a race through their writing. The sprint works this way. The teacher decides which traits-based runners will be running through the students papers. If students are really knowledgeable with traits language, or if there are classroom resources (posters, for example) that help them readily see the differences between the 6 traits, you can name the four (or fewer) racers after the writing traits. A race might, therefore, be run between: Race idea #1: or Race idea #2 1. Idea Development 2. Voice 3. Word Choice 4. Organization 1. Organization 2. Sentence Fluency 3. Voice 4. Conventions I always based my sprints on what traits we had been working on most recently or which traits I saw a lot of students struggling with. Personally, I didn t like using Conventions as a racer when they were working on revision from first to second draft; instead, I often ran Convention-specific races (see below) as the students edited their second drafts into final drafts. These Revision Sprint sheets can also be used as Editing Sprints. For students just learning traits language and concepts, I found it very helpful to run trait-specific races, instead of just running the big traits against the big traits. These really helped students see the specifics of each trait. For example, if my students had been working on organization, I could run one of the following races: Organization race #1: or Organization race #2 1. Introduction 2. Conclusion 3. Paragraphing 4. Thoughtful Transitions 1. Logical Sequence 2. Pacing 3. Introduction & Conclusion connection 4. Transition Variety In fact each sprint can focus on singular traits, especially if who classes are honing or struggling with single traits. Here are some good races to run through your students drafts: Idea Development Race: Voice Race: Convention Race: (works well before editing too) 1. Stays on pic 2. Sharp Details 3. Showing, not Telling 4. Unique examples 1. Conviction 2. Audience awareness 3. Interesting word use 4. Sounds good when read aloud 1. Spelling 2. Comma Control 3. Complete Sentence Use 4. Dialogue Punctuation Whatever the race being run, the student reads his/her own draft and decides which of the four (or fewer) runners performed the best in the writing; that runner is named the winner and an arrow is drawn from that runner to the finish line. The student writer also determines which runner ran the worst, and where the other racers ended up when the race was over; this is shown by drawing arrows from the runners to where they would be on the track when the winner was at the finish line. When students trust each other, a response group can run this race on all its members papers, as well as running it with their own writing. This gave my students great opportunities to talk about their different ideas on what would make the writing even better. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 14

Your Racers: The Revision Sprint (a model) 10 yards 20 yards 30 yards 40 yards 50 yards Finish Line Voice Word Choice Organization This example shows a student who has self-determined that his strongest runner (trait) was Word Choice and his weakest runner (trait) was Organization. The student agrees to revise his draft in such a way that Organization runs just as good a race as Word Choice, then begins planning ways to achieve that goal. Sentence Fluency Once the race is run, the student agrees to revise to somehow make the slower runners perform better in the paper s next draft. With some students, I simply asked them to help one of the slower runners perform better; with students who needed more or a challenge, I asked them to help all the slower runners perform better. The best thing about this technique, in my opinion, is that no matter how skilled or challenged a student writer is, one trait has to win this race. Each student ends up with a strongest trait and traits that could be developed further. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 15

The Revision Sprint Up to four runners will sprint through your paper s rough draft nothing like a good 50-yard dash to get your heart racing! Your teacher will tell you what names to give the runners; write their names below them. When you read your paper, indicate which of the four runners won the race by drawing a big, thick arrow between that runner and the finish line; then, determine where the other three runners were on the track when the race was won by drawing each of them an arrow. Decide who wins and comes in last based on the names of the runners. When you revise your draft, you will need to make sure your slowest racer ties your fastest racer. Before writing next draft, talk to your teacher about how you plan to make your slowest of runners a much better racer. Your Racers: 10 yards 20 yards 30 yards 40 yards 50 yards Finish Line (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 16

Idea Development each other, The author uses a balance of showing and telling. The author uses more specific details than general ones. The author describes things in unique and memorable ways. The author is trying to paint a picture in my head. There is a lot of evidence that this author cares about what he/she is writing about. Idea Development each other, The author uses a balance of showing and telling. The author uses more specific details than general ones. The author describes things in unique and memorable ways. The author is trying to paint a picture in my head. There is a lot of evidence that this author cares about what he/she is writing about. Idea Development each other, The author uses a balance of showing and telling. The author uses more specific details than general ones. The author describes things in unique and memorable ways. The author is trying to paint a picture in my head. There is a lot of evidence that this author cares about what he/she is writing about. Idea Development each other, The author uses a balance of showing and telling. The author uses more specific details than general ones. The author describes things in unique and memorable ways. The author is trying to paint a picture in my head. There is a lot of evidence that this author cares about what he/she is writing about. Idea Development each other, The author uses a balance of showing and telling. The author uses more specific details than general ones. The author describes things in unique and memorable ways. The author is trying to paint a picture in my head. There is a lot of evidence that this author cares about what he/she is writing about. Idea Development each other, The author uses a balance of showing and telling. The author uses more specific details than general ones. The author describes things in unique and memorable ways. The author is trying to paint a picture in my head. There is a lot of evidence that this author cares about what he/she is writing about. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 17

Organization each other, The author s introduction really captures my attention. The author put the story s events in an order that makes sense. The author uses transitions skillfully to move from idea to idea. I understand why the author put paragraph breaks where he/she did. The writing ends in a way that satisfies the reader. Organization each other, The author s introduction really captures my attention. The author put the story s events in an order that makes sense. The author uses transitions skillfully to move from idea to idea. I understand why the author put paragraph breaks where he/she did. The writing ends in a way that satisfies the reader. Organization each other, The author s introduction really captures my attention. The author put the story s events in an order that makes sense. The author uses transitions skillfully to move from idea to idea. I understand why the author put paragraph breaks where he/she did. The writing ends in a way that satisfies the reader. Organization each other, The author s introduction really captures my attention. The author put the story s events in an order that makes sense. The author uses transitions skillfully to move from idea to idea. I understand why the author put paragraph breaks where he/she did. The writing ends in a way that satisfies the reader. Organization each other, The author s introduction really captures my attention. The author put the story s events in an order that makes sense. The author uses transitions skillfully to move from idea to idea. I understand why the author put paragraph breaks where he/she did. The writing ends in a way that satisfies the reader. Organization each other, The author s introduction really captures my attention. The author put the story s events in an order that makes sense. The author uses transitions skillfully to move from idea to idea. I understand why the author put paragraph breaks where he/she did. The writing ends in a way that satisfies the reader. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 18

Voice each other, The style of writing reveals the author s personality to me. The author seems to honestly care about what he/she writes about. The author makes attempts to connect personally with the reader. The writer reveals an attitude (tone) about the topic. The writer is attempting to make me feel an emotion when I read. Voice each other, The style of writing reveals the author s personality to me. The author seems to honestly care about what he/she writes about. The author makes attempts to connect personally with the reader. The writer reveals an attitude (tone) about the topic. The writer is attempting to make me feel an emotion when I read. Voice each other, The style of writing reveals the author s personality to me. The author seems to honestly care about what he/she writes about. The author makes attempts to connect personally with the reader. The writer reveals an attitude (tone) about the topic. The writer is attempting to make me feel an emotion when I read. Voice each other, The style of writing reveals the author s personality to me. The author seems to honestly care about what he/she writes about. The author makes attempts to connect personally with the reader. The writer reveals an attitude (tone) about the topic. The writer is attempting to make me feel an emotion when I read. Voice each other, The style of writing reveals the author s personality to me. The author seems to honestly care about what he/she writes about. The author makes attempts to connect personally with the reader. The writer reveals an attitude (tone) about the topic. The writer is attempting to make me feel an emotion when I read. Voice each other, The style of writing reveals the author s personality to me. The author seems to honestly care about what he/she writes about. The author makes attempts to connect personally with the reader. The writer reveals an attitude (tone) about the topic. The writer is attempting to make me feel an emotion when I read. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 19

Word Choice each other, The writer s use of adjectives improves the quality of the writing. The writer s use of verbs makes the sentences much more interesting. The writer uses both specific and general nouns to describe/explain. Prepositional phrases help this writer s sentences flow. The writer uses figurative language techniques, like similes and metaphor or personification. Word Choice each other, The writer s use of adjectives improves the quality of the writing. The writer s use of verbs makes the sentences much more interesting. The writer uses both specific and general nouns to describe/explain. Prepositional phrases help this writer s sentences flow. The writer uses figurative language techniques, like similes and metaphor or personification. Word Choice each other, The writer s use of adjectives improves the quality of the writing. The writer s use of verbs makes the sentences much more interesting. The writer uses both specific and general nouns to describe/explain. Prepositional phrases help this writer s sentences flow. The writer uses figurative language techniques, like similes and metaphor or personification. Word Choice each other, The writer s use of adjectives improves the quality of the writing. The writer s use of verbs makes the sentences much more interesting. The writer uses both specific and general nouns to describe/explain. Prepositional phrases help this writer s sentences flow. The writer uses figurative language techniques, like similes and metaphor or personification. Word Choice Sticky Note: The writer s use of adjectives improves the quality of the writing. The writer s use of verbs makes the sentences much more interesting. The writer uses both specific and general nouns to describe/explain. Prepositional phrases help this writer s sentences flow. The writer uses figurative language techniques, like similes and metaphor or personification. Word Choice Sticky Note: The writer s use of adjectives improves the quality of the writing. The writer s use of verbs makes the sentences much more interesting. The writer uses both specific and general nouns to describe/explain. Prepositional phrases help this writer s sentences flow. The writer uses figurative language techniques, like similes and metaphor or personification. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 20

Sentence Fluency each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Sentence Fluency each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Sentence Fluency each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Sentence Fluency each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Sentence Fluency each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Sentence Fluency each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 21

Analyzing the Five Revision Traits each other, This author developed an idea well and used great details in writing. This author organized the writing so that it is easy to follow the ideas. The author s voice skills help me to know the writer better as a person. The author s word choices feel natural and improve the writing. The author uses a variety of sentence types in this writing. Analyzing the Five Revision Traits each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Analyzing the Five Revision Traits each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Analyzing the Five Revision Traits each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Analyzing the Five Revision Traits each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. Analyzing the Five Revision Traits each other, Most of the author s sentences begin with different words. The writer uses both simple and complex sentences here. The writer uses a variety of transitional words and phrases. The author includes sentence structures that are not predictable. The variety of sentences adds a rhythm or cadence to the writing, if it s read aloud. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 22

Narrative Sticky Note: Narrative Sticky Note: I used a balance of showing and telling skills (idea development). My details are specific and memorable (idea development). My introduction secures my reader s attention (organization). I used transitions as I moved from idea to idea (organization). If read aloud, this would sound natural and conversational (voice). I used a balance of showing and telling skills (idea development). My details are specific and memorable (idea development). My introduction secures my reader s attention (organization). I used transitions as I moved from idea to idea (organization). If read aloud, this would sound natural and conversational (voice). Narrative Sticky Note: Narrative Sticky Note: I used a balance of showing and telling skills (idea development). My details are specific and memorable (idea development). My introduction secures my reader s attention (organization). I used transitions as I moved from idea to idea (organization). If read aloud, this would sound natural and conversational (voice). I used a balance of showing and telling skills (idea development). My details are specific and memorable (idea development). My introduction secures my reader s attention (organization). I used transitions as I moved from idea to idea (organization). If read aloud, this would sound natural and conversational (voice). Narrative Sticky Note: Narrative Sticky Note: I used a balance of showing and telling skills (idea development). My details are specific and memorable (idea development). My introduction secures my reader s attention (organization). I used transitions as I moved from idea to idea (organization). If read aloud, this would sound natural and conversational (voice). I used a balance of showing and telling skills (idea development). My details are specific and memorable (idea development). My introduction secures my reader s attention (organization). I used transitions as I moved from idea to idea (organization). If read aloud, this would sound natural and conversational (voice). (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 23

Expository Sticky Note: Expository Sticky Note: I break my ideas into sub-topics that are kept separate. (org) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my essay. (org) I explain my reasons/ideas with specific details. (ideas) The way I explain my ideas helps my reader to know me. (voice) My sub-topics feel equal; no subtopic really stands out as being more important. (ideas and org) I break my ideas into sub-topics that are kept separate. (org) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my essay. (org) I explain my reasons/ideas with specific details. (ideas) The way I explain my ideas helps my reader to know me. (voice) My sub-topics feel equal; no subtopic really stands out as being more important. (ideas and org) Expository Sticky Note: Expository Sticky Note: I break my ideas into sub-topics that are kept separate. (org) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my essay. (org) I explain my reasons/ideas with specific details. (ideas) The way I explain my ideas helps my reader to know me. (voice) My sub-topics feel equal; no subtopic really stands out as being more important. (ideas and org) I break my ideas into sub-topics that are kept separate. (org) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my essay. (org) I explain my reasons/ideas with specific details. (ideas) The way I explain my ideas helps my reader to know me. (voice) My sub-topics feel equal; no subtopic really stands out as being more important. (ideas and org) Expository Sticky Note: Expository Sticky Note: I break my ideas into sub-topics that are kept separate. (org) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my essay. (org) I explain my reasons/ideas with specific details. (ideas) The way I explain my ideas helps my reader to know me. (voice) My sub-topics feel equal; no subtopic really stands out as being more important. (ideas and org) I break my ideas into sub-topics that are kept separate. (org) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my essay. (org) I explain my reasons/ideas with specific details. (ideas) The way I explain my ideas helps my reader to know me. (voice) My sub-topics feel equal; no subtopic really stands out as being more important. (ideas and org) (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 24

Persuasive Sticky Note: Persuasive Sticky Note: My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my argument. (org) I maintain a tone (attitude) about my topic throughout the writing. (voice) My choice of specific details strengthens my argument. (ideas) My transitions help my reader know where new ideas begin and end. (org) I am not one-sided here; I skillfully acknowledge opposing viewpoints. (ideas and voice) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my argument. (org) I maintain a tone (attitude) about my topic throughout the writing. (voice) My choice of specific details strengthens my argument. (ideas) My transitions help my reader know where new ideas begin and end. (org) I am not one-sided here; I skillfully acknowledge opposing viewpoints. (ideas and voice) Persuasive Sticky Note: Persuasive Sticky Note: My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my argument. (org) I maintain a tone (attitude) about my topic throughout the writing. (voice) My choice of specific details strengthens my argument. (ideas) My transitions help my reader know where new ideas begin and end. (org) I am not one-sided here; I skillfully acknowledge opposing viewpoints. (ideas and voice) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my argument. (org) I maintain a tone (attitude) about my topic throughout the writing. (voice) My choice of specific details strengthens my argument. (ideas) My transitions help my reader know where new ideas begin and end. (org) I am not one-sided here; I skillfully acknowledge opposing viewpoints. (ideas and voice) Persuasive Sticky Note: Persuasive Sticky Note: My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my argument. (org) I maintain a tone (attitude) about my topic throughout the writing. (voice) My choice of specific details strengthens my argument. (ideas) My transitions help my reader know where new ideas begin and end. (org) I am not one-sided here; I skillfully acknowledge opposing viewpoints. (ideas and voice) My intro and conclusion grab my reader and sum up my argument. (org) I maintain a tone (attitude) about my topic throughout the writing. (voice) My choice of specific details strengthens my argument. (ideas) My transitions help my reader know where new ideas begin and end. (org) I am not one-sided here; I skillfully acknowledge opposing viewpoints. (ideas and voice) (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 25

Editing Sticky Note: Have your five editors initial next to what they edited your draft for. Editing Sticky Note: Have your five editors initial next to what they edited your draft for. I checked this draft for spelling mistakes. I checked this draft for periods and end punctuation. I checked this draft for verb tense and grammar problems. I checked this draft for apostrophes and capital letters. I checked this draft for commas and dialogue punctuation. I checked this draft for spelling mistakes. I checked this draft for periods and end punctuation. I checked this draft for verb tense and grammar problems. I checked this draft for apostrophes and capital letters. I checked this draft for commas and dialogue punctuation. Editing Sticky Note: Have your five editors initial next to what they edited your draft for. Editing Sticky Note: Have your five editors initial next to what they edited your draft for. I checked this draft for spelling mistakes. I checked this draft for periods and end punctuation. I checked this draft for verb tense and grammar problems. I checked this draft for apostrophes and capital letters. I checked this draft for commas and dialogue punctuation. I checked this draft for spelling mistakes. I checked this draft for periods and end punctuation. I checked this draft for verb tense and grammar problems. I checked this draft for apostrophes and capital letters. I checked this draft for commas and dialogue punctuation. Editing Sticky Note: Have your five editors initial next to what they edited your draft for. Editing Sticky Note: Have your five editors initial next to what they edited your draft for. I checked this draft for spelling mistakes. I checked this draft for periods and end punctuation. I checked this draft for verb tense and grammar problems. I checked this draft for apostrophes and capital letters. I checked this draft for commas and dialogue punctuation. I checked this draft for spelling mistakes. I checked this draft for periods and end punctuation. I checked this draft for verb tense and grammar problems. I checked this draft for apostrophes and capital letters. I checked this draft for commas and dialogue punctuation. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 26

Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I capitalized the first word in every sentence and any proper noun. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I capitalized the first word in every sentence and any proper noun. There is a period at the end of every sentence. There is a period at the end of every sentence. My word wall words are all spelled correctly in this draft. My word wall words are all spelled correctly in this draft. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I capitalized the first word in every sentence and any proper noun. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I capitalized the first word in every sentence and any proper noun. There is a period at the end of every sentence. There is a period at the end of every sentence. My word wall words are all spelled correctly in this draft. My word wall words are all spelled correctly in this draft. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I capitalized the first word in every sentence and any proper noun. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I capitalized the first word in every sentence and any proper noun. There is a period at the end of every sentence. There is a period at the end of every sentence. My word wall words are all spelled correctly in this draft. My word wall words are all spelled correctly in this draft. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 27

Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I have put apostrophes in all the right places. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I have put apostrophes in all the right places. My use of the following is correct: they re vs there vs their; your vs you re My use of the following is correct: they re vs there vs their; your vs you re I use periods, exclamation points, and question marks where my sentences end. I use periods, exclamation points, and question marks where my sentences end. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I have put apostrophes in all the right places. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I have put apostrophes in all the right places. My use of the following is correct: they re vs there vs their; your vs you re My use of the following is correct: they re vs there vs their; your vs you re I use periods, exclamation points, and question marks where my sentences end. I use periods, exclamation points, and question marks where my sentences end. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I have put apostrophes in all the right places. Perfect Practice Sticky Note: Initial each line after writing today if you made sure you did all three in your draft today. I have put apostrophes in all the right places. My use of the following is correct: they re vs there vs their; your vs you re My use of the following is correct: they re vs there vs their; your vs you re I use periods, exclamation points, and question marks where my sentences end. I use periods, exclamation points, and question marks where my sentences end. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 28

Idea Development Sticky Note: I use a balance of showing and telling. My details, instead of being general, are specific. I describe things in unique and memorable ways. My writing is focused and doesn t stray off topic. It is clear from my writing that I like my topic or idea. Idea Development Sticky Note: I use a balance of showing and telling. My details, instead of being general, are specific. I describe things in unique and memorable ways. My writing is focused and doesn t stray off topic. It is clear from my writing that I like my topic or idea. Idea Development Sticky Note: I use a balance of showing and telling. My details, instead of being general, are specific. I describe things in unique and memorable ways. My writing is focused and doesn t stray off topic. It is clear from my writing that I like my topic or idea. Idea Development Sticky Note: I use a balance of showing and telling. My details, instead of being general, are specific. I describe things in unique and memorable ways. My writing is focused and doesn t stray off topic. It is clear from my writing that I like my topic or idea. Idea Development Sticky Note: I use a balance of showing and telling. My details, instead of being general, are specific. I describe things in unique and memorable ways. My writing is focused and doesn t stray off topic. It is clear from my writing that I like my topic or idea. Idea Development Sticky Note: I use a balance of showing and telling. My details, instead of being general, are specific. I describe things in unique and memorable ways. My writing is focused and doesn t stray off topic. It is clear from my writing that I like my topic or idea. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 29

Organization Sticky Note: My introduction hooks the reader in an interesting way. All my ideas are presented in a logical sequence. The transitions show where my idea/story moves forward. The organization of the whole piece feels natural, not forced. My conclusion leaves the reader satisfied. Organization Sticky Note: My introduction hooks the reader in an interesting way. All my ideas are presented in a logical sequence. The transitions show where my idea/story moves forward. The organization of the whole piece feels natural, not forced. My conclusion leaves the reader satisfied. Organization Sticky Note: Organization Sticky Note: My introduction hooks the reader in an interesting way. All my ideas are presented in a logical sequence. The transitions show where my idea/story moves forward. The organization of the whole piece feels natural, not forced. My conclusion leaves the reader satisfied. My introduction hooks the reader in an interesting way. All my ideas are presented in a logical sequence. The transitions show where my idea/story moves forward. The organization of the whole piece feels natural, not forced. My conclusion leaves the reader satisfied. Organization Sticky Note: Organization Sticky Note: My introduction hooks the reader in an interesting way. All my ideas are presented in a logical sequence. The transitions show where my idea/story moves forward. The organization of the whole piece feels natural, not forced. My conclusion leaves the reader satisfied. My introduction hooks the reader in an interesting way. All my ideas are presented in a logical sequence. The transitions show where my idea/story moves forward. The organization of the whole piece feels natural, not forced. My conclusion leaves the reader satisfied. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 30

Voice Sticky Note: Voice Sticky Note: My writing style reveals a lot about my personality. My word choice skills sound natural, not forced. My writing comes across as honest and convincing. My writing attempts to connect with my audience. My attitude about my topic is obvious. My writing style reveals a lot about my personality. My word choice skills sound natural, not forced. My writing comes across as honest and convincing. My writing attempts to connect with my audience. My attitude about my topic is obvious. Voice Sticky Note: Voice Sticky Note: My writing style reveals a lot about my personality. My word choice skills sound natural, not forced. My writing comes across as honest and convincing. My writing attempts to connect with my audience. My attitude about my topic is obvious. My writing style reveals a lot about my personality. My word choice skills sound natural, not forced. My writing comes across as honest and convincing. My writing attempts to connect with my audience. My attitude about my topic is obvious. Voice Sticky Note: Voice Sticky Note: My writing style reveals a lot about my personality. My word choice skills sound natural, not forced. My writing comes across as honest and convincing. My writing attempts to connect with my audience. My attitude about my topic is obvious. My writing style reveals a lot about my personality. My word choice skills sound natural, not forced. My writing comes across as honest and convincing. My writing attempts to connect with my audience. My attitude about my topic is obvious. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 31

Word Choice Sticky Note: My adjectives are thoughtful and fit my descriptions. I chose verbs that both show and tell my reader information. My specific use of nouns makes my details more memorable. Figurative language (similes, metaphors, etc.) feels natural. I take risks with words; I don t just use predictable ones. Word Choice Sticky Note: My adjectives are thoughtful and fit my descriptions. I chose verbs that both show and tell my reader information. My specific use of nouns makes my details more memorable. Figurative language (similes, metaphors, etc.) feels natural. I take risks with words; I don t just use predictable ones. Word Choice Sticky Note: Word Choice Sticky Note: My adjectives are thoughtful and fit my descriptions. I chose verbs that both show and tell my reader information. My specific use of nouns makes my details more memorable. Figurative language (similes, metaphors, etc.) feels natural. I take risks with words; I don t just use predictable ones. My adjectives are thoughtful and fit my descriptions. I chose verbs that both show and tell my reader information. My specific use of nouns makes my details more memorable. Figurative language (similes, metaphors, etc.) feels natural. I take risks with words; I don t just use predictable ones. Word Choice Sticky Note: Word Choice Sticky Note: My adjectives are thoughtful and fit my descriptions. I chose verbs that both show and tell my reader information. My specific use of nouns makes my details more memorable. Figurative language (similes, metaphors, etc.) feels natural. I take risks with words; I don t just use predictable ones. My adjectives are thoughtful and fit my descriptions. I chose verbs that both show and tell my reader information. My specific use of nouns makes my details more memorable. Figurative language (similes, metaphors, etc.) feels natural. I take risks with words; I don t just use predictable ones. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 32

Sent. Fluency Sticky Note: My sentences mostly begin with different words. I use both simple and complex sentences. I use a variety of transitional words and phrases. Sentence structures that might surprise my reader add voice. I add rhythm to sentences with prepositional phrases and similar writing tools. Sent. Fluency Sticky Note: My sentences mostly begin with different words. I use both simple and complex sentences. I use a variety of transitional words and phrases. Sentence structures that might surprise my reader add voice. I add rhythm to sentences with prepositional phrases and similar writing tools. Sent. Fluency Sticky Note: Sent. Fluency Sticky Note: My sentences mostly begin with different words. I use both simple and complex sentences. I use a variety of transitional words and phrases. Sentence structures that might surprise my reader add voice. I add rhythm to sentences with prepositional phrases and similar writing tools. My sentences mostly begin with different words. I use both simple and complex sentences. I use a variety of transitional words and phrases. Sentence structures that might surprise my reader add voice. I add rhythm to sentences with prepositional phrases and similar writing tools. Sent. Fluency Sticky Note: Sent. Fluency Sticky Note: My sentences mostly begin with different words. I use both simple and complex sentences. I use a variety of transitional words and phrases. Sentence structures that might surprise my reader add voice. I add rhythm to sentences with prepositional phrases and similar writing tools. My sentences mostly begin with different words. I use both simple and complex sentences. I use a variety of transitional words and phrases. Sentence structures that might surprise my reader add voice. I add rhythm to sentences with prepositional phrases and similar writing tools. (c) 2017. These materials were presented during a workshop by Corbett Harrison. http://corbettharrison.com 33