Lillenas Drama Presents What s My Witness? From These Truths Were Made for Walking By Martha Bolton Cast: AMANDA WAVERLING Show Host BIFF MALONE Celebrity Panel CHAD MITCHUM ANGELA FORENZA K. O. SANDERS MITZI PORTOLA Set: Set of the popular new game show, What s My Witness? (should look like TV game show set) Props: Long table Small table Six chairs Sign that says WHAT S MY WITNESS? Wallet Costumes: Modern-day wear (The long table and four chairs are stage right. CHAD, ANGELA, K. O., and MITZI are seated behind the table. The smaller table is center stage. BIFF sits in a chair behind it. The What s My Witness? sign is directly behind him. An empty chair, for our contestant, is next to him.) BIFF: Good evening and welcome to another edition of What s My Witness? the game show where we try to guess what contestants believe by the way they live their lives. First, let s meet our celebrity panel.... Chad Mitchum is no stranger to television audiences. (CHAD waves to audience.) He s no stranger to television audiences than he is in person....just kidding, Chad.
CHAD: I d like to buy a vowel, Biff. BIFF: Sorry, Chad. Wrong game show... Ladies and gentlemen, funnyman Chad Mitchum. (BIFF leads the audience in applause as CHAD waves again.) Our next panelist is gifted, witty, charming, and gorgeous... CHAD: You already introduced me, Biff. BIFF: I m not talking about you, Chad. I m talking about the lovely Angela Forenza. (ANGELA waves to audience as BIFF leads them in applause.) ANGELA: It s a pleasure to be here, Biff. BIFF: Our next panelist is known to sports fans as one of the top boxers of our time....i could have had muscles like that, but I left them in my other suit. Ladies and gentlemen, the one and only K. O. Sanders. (K. O. waves as BIFF leads the audience in applause.) And finally, the unpredictable and zany Mitzi Portola. You ll recall Mitzi was a key player in the biggest hit of the year. It was a seven-car pile-up on Interstate 40. MITZI: Biff, I ll have you know I m a very safe driver. I follow all the rules of the sidewalk. BIFF: Ladies and gentlemen, Mitzi Portola. (BIFF leads the audience in applause.) Now, it s time to meet tonight s contestant. (AMANDA enters and stands by her chair.) Amanda Waverling is a business owner as well as a wife and mother of six children. MITZI: Six kids! She probably just came here tonight for the rest. BIFF: Ladies and gentlemen, let s give a warm welcome to Amanda Waverling. (He leads the audience in applause. AMANDA sits.) Panel, you may begin your questioning. CHAD: Hi, Amanda. (AMANDA nods.) Amanda, how often do you pick up your Bible? AMANDA: Three or four times a day. CHAD (impressed): Three or four times a day? AMANDA: Yeah, someone keeps putting it on top of the TV Guide. CHAD: I meant how often do you read the Bible? AMANDA: Read it?...uh, I guess about every...uh... about every...can I pass on that one, Biff? BIFF (to panel): Next question, please.
K. O.: Mrs. Waverling, if you came upon an injured man by the side of the road, would you walk on by or be a good Samaritan and help him? AMANDA: Frankly, I d need more information to answer that. K. O.: More information? AMANDA: You know, like am I in my good clothes? Does he have more than five broken bones? Am I late for my hair appointment? Is there... K. O. (cutting in): Never mind. I think you just answered the question. MITZI: Amanda, do you ever spread gossip? AMANDA: Of course not! (MITZI smiles, pleased, then AMANDA continues.) If I can t start it in the first place, I figure why bother! (MITZI looks at others on the panel. They all shake their heads as if to say, Where do they get these contestants? ) ANGELA: Amanda, do you usually go the extra mile? AMANDA: I did today. I got lost on the way to the studio. CHAD: Do you envy others? AMANDA: No. (Whining) But how come that last contestant won a new car? MITZI: Are you willing to turn the other cheek? AMANDA: Why? Is my makeup smeared? K. O.: Do you give to others? AMANDA: Sure. I always give them what s coming to them. K. O. (to others on panel): This is going to be easier than I thought. ANGELA: Are you patient, Amanda? AMANDA: Yes. (A brief pause) Can we hurry this up a bit? CHAD: Is humility one of your attributes? AMANDA: Absolutely. I m humble and very proud of it! MITZI: Do you forgive seventy times seven? AMANDA: Well, to tell you the truth, I ve never been very good at multiplication. K. O.: Have you ever taken anyone to church?
AMANDA: I picked up the pastor once when his car broke down. K. O.: I guess that counts. AMANDA: Yeah. (Proudly) And I only charged him half-price for the gas. CHAD: Do you love your neighbor as yourself, Amanda? AMANDA: I would, but we haven t been on speaking terms for years. MITZI: Do you have control of your anger? AMANDA: Yes. (Yells) Now, get off my case, will ya? ANGELA: Do you ever cheat on your income taxes? AMANDA (stretches her collar away from her neck): Is it getting warm in here to anyone else, or is it just me? CHAD: If you found a wallet full of money, would you turn it in? AMANDA (begrudgingly takes wallet out of her pocket and hands it to BIFF): OK, OK, here!...my husband told you about that, didn t he? ANGELA: What about your prayer life, Amanda? AMANDA: I m doing a lot of praying right now. BIFF: Panel, it looks like we have time for just one more question. K. O.: Amanda, what s the single most important goal in your life? AMANDA: Getting even with the person who turned my name in for this show. ANGELA: You re not having fun? AMANDA: I just want to get this over with and go back to living my life the way I want to you know, without all the scrutiny. BIFF: Well, there you have it, panel. Amanda s given us a look at the walk, now let s find out about the talk.... Amanda Waverling, what s your witness? AMANDA (rises to her feet and says proudly): I m a believer. (Panel looks at each other, stunned.) BIFF: Yes, panel, it s true. Amanda Waverling is a believer. Did any of you guess it? ANGELA: Not me. CHAD: I sure didn t.
MITZI: Furthest thing from my mind. K. O.: Could ve fooled me. As a matter of fact, she did. BIFF: Well, Amanda, it looks like a hundred percent. You ve successfully fooled every single member of our panel. AMANDA (jumping up and down excitedly): Wow! I did it! This is great! This means I m a winner, right?! I m a winner! I m a winner! I m a winner! BIFF: Sorry, Amanda, but when your walk doesn t match your talk, you always come out the loser. (As AMANDA lowers her head, BIFF looks into imaginary camera.) And so until next week, all of us here on What s My Witness? say thanks for tuning in. And remember, man s true best friend is his faith, so why not take yours out for a walk today? (Blackout.) The purchase of this sketch entitles the purchaser to make photocopies of this material for use in their church or nonprofit organization. The sharing of this material with other churches or organizations not owned or controlled by the original purchaser is strictly prohibited. The contents of this sketch may not be reproduced in any other form without written permission from the publisher. Please include the copyright statement found below on each copy made. Questions? Please write, call, or E-mail: Lillenas Publishing Company Phone: 816-931-1900 E-mail: drama@lillenas.com Drama Resources Fax: 816-412-8390 Web Site: www.lillenasdrama.com P.O. Box 419527 Kansas City, MO 64141 The sketch collection These Truths Were Made for Walking (MP-674) is available for purchase from Lillenas Drama or from your local Christian bookstore. For a full description of the rest of this collection, or to purchase other individual sketches, refer to www.lillenasdrama.com