JUNE 2018 Helderberg Branch YOUR COMMITTEE FOR 2018

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Hello to you all, JUNE 2018 Helderberg Branch YOUR COMMITTEE FOR 2018 Chairman: Chris Marshall 073 2201443 Secretary: Lorna Marshall Committee minutes Gerry Hogg & AnnatjieVisser Club membership Treasurer: AnnatjieVisser 021 851 1673 EFTs: Standard Bank 051 001 Savings Account 036 576 859- Helderberg SAARP Club Speakers: Sally Brownie 021 850 2169 Catering: Pam Rosenkrantz 073 473 2616 Outings: David Boucher 021 850 2293 & Penny West 073 921 8109 A wedding to remember! A sublime day plus a beautiful ceremony Historic and so refreshing but with great reverence and seeing so many happy smiles from the Royals and around the world! The Queen could be proud down to her grays' strutting their stuff so regimentally! Our speaker for May, although late giving your committee some anxious moments, Cherise gave us such an interesting talk on Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens and what goes on behind the scenes in keeping meticulous details on a data base of all plants discovered! Sally Brownie Editor/Compiler Enjoy the read. FOR STARTERS... A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat at his feet. He had a sign which read, I am blind please help. There were only a few coins in his hat. A man walked by, took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around and wrote something on it. He put it back and walked off. Soon the boy realised that the hat began to fill with coins. That afternoon the man who changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy remembered his footsteps and asked, Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write? The man said, I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but only in a different way I wrote Today is a beautiful day, but I cannot see it The first sign simply said that the boy was blind, however, the second sign told people that they were lucky to be able to see. Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective? So, be thankful for what you have, be creative, be innovative, think differently and think positively.

OF INTEREST Trees over the next month or two starting with a poem: (Author unknown) I THINK that I shall never see A poem lovely as a tree. A tree whose hungry mouth is prest Against the sweet earth's flowing breast; A tree that looks at God all day, And lifts her leafy arms to pray; A tree that may in summer wear A nest of robins in her hair; Upon whose bosom snow has lain; Who intimately lives with rain. Poems are made by fools like me, But only God can make a tree. The Tule Tree, listed as one of the ten greatest trees in the world. CLUB NEWS CHAIRMANS PLEA!!! For our Mad Hatters Tea Party on the 17 th September we are looking for any unwanted patterned side plates, tea/coffee cups, saucers, sugar bowls, tea pots (with or without lids) nothing needs to match used for décor but not returned as it will all be donated to a good cause! BRING ON THE 25 TH JUNE UNTIL SEPTEMBER!! COLLECTION POINT AT ENTRANCE TO THE HALL.

You and Your Grants 2018 is a comprehensive beneficiary education tool that explains the different types of social grants, the qualifying requirements for each grant type and the latest updated social grant amounts. The SASSA booklet also provides information on: Qualifying requirements Where to apply for a grant Asset and Income Threshold Amounts of Grants as at 1 April 2017 Renew SASSA cards September 2018 Contact details of SASSA Head Office and all regional SASSA branches Customer care department on 0800601011 Red cross memorial children s hospital reminder REQUEST FOR WOOL FROM HELDERBERG STROKE SUPPORT GROUP. PLEASE BRING YOUR CONTRIBUTION ON THE 25 TH JUNE COLLECTION POINT WILL BE MADE AVAILABLE AT ENTRANCE TO HALL. World Elder Abuse Awareness Day on 15 June SPEAK UP, TAKE ACTION! INFORMATION YOU CAN USE! SAPS South African Police Service Emergency Number: 10111 Crime Stop report criminal activity anonymously: 08600 10111 Mobile phone emergency number: 112 GUEST SPEAKER 25 th JUNE Our guest speaker will be Bridget Brown who will give a talk on Medicinal Cannabis and in particular the Panacea Balm which will also be available to purchase at a discounted price of R400.00 after the meeting.

FORTHCOMING EVENTS/OUTINGS Our outing to the Baxter to hear the 1 and half Tenors was enjoyed by all! 25 th JULY V & A WATERFRONT R140.00 WITH A TWIST! N.B.!! THE BUS LEAVES AT 9.00A.M. SHARP FROM THE LIBRARY TO RETURN TO SOMERSET WEST AT 3.00 P.M.! ALL OPTIONS ARE FOR YOUR OWN ACCOUNT! AQUARIUM MA MIA 2 FILM @ 11.00 A.M. ISLAND HOP LUNCH Or you can do your own thing! PLEASE NOTE R140.00 IS FOR TRANSPORT ONLY! BOOK & PAY ON THE 25 TH JUNE! COSTS FOR OUTINGS ARE RISING! Outings from JUNE will only be arranged every 2 nd month. Our next outing will therefore be in SEPTEMBER to KIRSTENBOSCH! DATE TO BE ANNOUNCED! DATES TO REMEMBER 17 th SEPTEMBER MAD HATTERS TEA REMINDER! ADD YOUR NAME FOR CATERING PURPOSES ON 25 TH JUNE! 7 th NOVEMBER DAY OF REMEMBERANCE RED CROSS CHILDREN S HOSPITAL. 5 TH DECEMBER CHRISTMAS LUNCH R300.00 PAYABLE IN INSTALLMENTS LAST ONE DUE IN OCTOBER! MEMBERS/CONTRIBUTIONS Have you ideas for OUTINGS/SPEAKERS Please contact your committee!

NEWCOMERS A very warm welcome goes out to you. May you have many years of friendship & happiness at SAARP HELDERBERG SOCIAL CLUB. Warm wishes to you all! Have a really happy day! GET WELL SOON We wish those of you who feel poorly, a speedy recovery. REUSE,RECYCLE,REDUCE, REFUSE! Don't just bin it, could someone else make use of it? DONATE IT, DON'T DUMP IT Think Before You Throw! BE WATER WISE! CONTINUE TO SAVE! SAVE! SAVE! WHAT IS YOUR WATER FOOTPRINT LIKE?? CAT Close a Tap! LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE A woman phones the Somerset West police station and says, "My husband went to buy potatoes two days ago and has not yet come back."there is a long pause before the cop says, "Eish madam! Can't you cook something else?" The police came to Paddy s door, holding a picture of his wife. They ask Is this your wife? Shocked, Paddy said yes They said It looks like she s been hit by a bus! Paddy said, I know, but she has a lovely personality.

An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut... The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?' 'Just water,' says the priest. The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?' The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!' NAUGHTY BUT NICE... Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, 'I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhoea in the convent.' 'Thank God,' said an elderly nun at the back. 'I'm so tired of chardonnay.' DINTJIES EN DANTJIES Die skooljaar is weer gang en dis Bennie se tweededag op skool. Tot sy ma se verbasing is hy die oggend 10h terug by die huis. Waarom is jynouterug? vra ma. Die mnren die juffrou het gaan braai se Bennie. GAAN BRAAI, op n Dinsdagoggendwaneerhullemoetwerk? Hoe weetjydit? vrasy ma. Meneer het virjuffrouoorintekomgeroepengesesymoethaar rooster bring. Toe komek maar huistoe, want ekweet lank vat n fliipen braai! Die pastor druk Meraai 3 keer onder die water en na die 3de keer se die pastor: Jy s nou gedoop en van vandag af is jy nuwe skepsel.. die ou ene ioe Meraai s weg. Geen alkahol meer oor jou lippe nie! So van vandag af is jy Maria! Later toe Meraai (nou Maria) by die huis kom, is sy reguit yskas toe. Sy haal n bottle yskoue wyn uit. Sy tap die wasbak vol water en druk die bottle 3 x onder die water en se Dijy is nou Oros! ARMCHAIR TRAVEL SAARP member Stanley shares his adventure to KZN. Ndumo in Northern KZN is 400 klm from Durban.Proclaimed a reserve in 1924, it is run by Ezemvelo KZN Wildlife. There being no perimeter fence, guests are advised to be on guard for wild visitors! Due to the lack of luxuries i.e. cell phones, no big 5 s, therefore not on the foreign tourist track! Bongani our guide was extremely knowledgeable with a great sense of humour. On our many outings we experienced the spectacular lake Nyamithi fringed by forests of Fever trees and a variety of other species. The park has a fair mammal population, the Hippo being the largest! A Warthog without his antenna tail, could not detect us on the track only a few metres

away! Other mammals expertly tracked, were Giraffe, Porcupine, Monkeys, Wildebeest, Nyalas and Impalas. COMPUTER ALERT! Take advantage of this incredible technology we have been gifted with BUT be aware of scams by following the rules below: 1. Be vigilant online. 2. If it looks odd or too good to be true, delete it. 3. Don t respond to emails offering free gifts or prizes. 4. Practise safe web browsing. 5. Avoid using a public network. 6. Passwords are sacred.

PARTING SHOT THANKS T here s a rare and special quality in the way some people live. H owever busy they may be, they still have time to give. A nything you ask or need, they ll do their very best. N o matter what the task is, or how simple the request. K indness just comes naturally to this rare selfless few. S pecial, giving people people just like you! LAST WORD One for the road ahead! My prayer for 2018 is for A fat bank account & a thin body. Please don't mix these up like you did last year. AMEN We hope you enjoyed your newsletter, comments/input to the Committee. See you on the 25 th June! Sally & Chris