Adab 1: Prohibitions of the Tongue Lecture 12 1
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Line 31 :الغيبة This line is about the prohibition of The definition we learnt from the hadith: ع ن أ ب ي ه ر ي ر ة أ ن ر س ول اهلل ص ل ى اهلل ع ل ي ه و س ل م ق ال أ ت د ر ون م ا ال غ يب ة ق ال وا اهلل و ر س ول ه أ ع ل م ق ال : ذ ك ر ك أ خ اك ب م ا ي ك ر ه ق يل أ ف ر أ ي ت إ ن ك ان ف ي أ خ ي م ا أ ق ول ق ال إ ن ك ان ف يه م ا ت ق ول ف ق د اغ ت ب ت ه و إ ن ل م ي ك ن ف يه ف ق د ب ه ت ه ] مسلم ع ن أ ب ي ه ر ي ر ة ] Rough translation: On the authority of Abu Huraira, that the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, said: Do you know what backbiting is?. They said Allah and his messenger know best. He said That you recall something about your brother which he dislikes. They said What if you see that he is what you say?. He said If it true then you have backbitten, if not then it is a false backbiting (lie/ slander)
Line 31 The criteria of backbiting is: Any piece of information mentioned/indicated to that a person would not like to have mentioned. It does not matter if the information: Is true You are not afraid to say it to their face We are almost always unsure if a person would dislike to have something mentioned. The risk of backbiting is therefore always very high
Line 31 As we had studied in the article by Dr Ratib Al-Nabulsi, backbiting does not just have to be something to do with the person himself: Anything associated with the person: His fashion, his habits, his family, his house, his clothes, even his dog In the explanation of the poem it even gives the example of someone observing that someone has a wide sleeve as an example of backbiting
Line 31 - Ghazali on reasons for backbiting Imam Ghazali - He gives 11 motives for which people may start to backbite (we will look at 8 as the other 3 are limited to scholars) 1. Backbiting Therapy - Backbiting can heal a person s rage. If you are deeply angry at a person or something, you begin to attack them/ or someone. There is some therapy in this form of torture. 1.In criticising, and ruining his reputation. A very جاهلي form of therapy by harming someone 2. Trying to fit in- Being in a conversation in which people are backbiting. Some people participate in backbiting so as to socialise 1.The person feels that backbiting helps hime feel part of the conversation. In effect the others have created this atmosphere of backbiting and have encouraged quite participants to join in
Line 31 - Ghazali s reasons for backbiting 3. When we are defending ourselves from being defamed in the eyes of someone important- Sometimes we fear that someone is going to criticise us and ruin our reputation and hence we backbite 1. Backbiting someone else, sometimes makes our crime/ reputation less worse 4.When someone says we do some bad action: 1.We mention others who do it to make ourselves feel better/ provide some justification 5. In order to elevate one s self/ boasting by criticising others: 1. We can say this person cannot do this and I can. This person is not very good at doing this etc.
Line 31 - Ghazali s reasons for backbiting 6. Jealousy - Sometimes, when someone else is being praised we feel some envy/ hate towards that person. We attempt to lower their reputation by backbiting 1.In order to diminish that praise we backbite the person 7. Just for fun, to joke around and entertain - And so he/she recalls stories of others to make people laugh by means of imitation, recalling embarrassing incidents 8. Mockery and having a low opinion of someone else - We may see someone as having many problems, we dislike things about them and hence we backbite them 1.Reasons for this are generally arrogance and to reduce the position of others
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Line 32 If backbiting is committed against someone else then a sincere apology needs to be made in order for the sin to be properly forgiven: This is similar to stealing wealth. If a person steals money, they have to return the wealth before the توبة is accepted. In a similar way you have to go to the person and mention what you said about them You have to give this level of detail, because otherwise they might think that it was something simple.
Line 32 This opinion is the strongest opinion. It is most often quoted in the Tafsir of the verses of backbiting Based on this opinion. If you backbite someone you need to seek forgiveness from the people that were affected. eg: If a father was backbitten, the children need to be apologised to in a similar fashion If a teacher was backbitten, the students need to be apologised to This is because, they were also harmed by your backbiting
Line 32 There is however as second opinion, which says that the person does not need to explicitly apologise to the person. It is enough for him to make sincere توبة to Allah and never commit the sin again. This is because the person who you apologise to may not forgive you and it may lead to further complications. You should note that this is not famous opinion. You should understand that if following the second opinion, you can see still how serious a crime you are committing by backbiting