The World; The Arena of Civilization

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Ontario Review Volume 23 Fall Winter 1985 86 Article 9 August 2014 The World; The Arena of Civilization Jon Davis Follow this and additional works at: http://repository.usfca.edu/ontarioreview Part of the Poetry Commons Recommended Citation Davis, Jon (2014) "The World; The Arena of Civilization," Ontario Review: Vol. 23, Article 9. Available at: http://repository.usfca.edu/ontarioreview/vol23/iss1/9 For more information, please contact southerr@usfca.edu.

T w o P o e m s JON DAVIS The World "It's a world full of people waiting for you to fuck up." My father said that in 1959, twisting the throttle, one hand on the suicide shift. When the phone rang in the kitchen, my mother's voice was like water spinning down the drain. We drove to a warehouse where men in white worked all night to deliver him to death, but he did not die. He became a voice, a wind that blows through my calm thoughts, telling me again that the world waits for you to fuck up, to splatter yourself against a bridge or ride over a guardrail on a mountain road. They'll watch. They'll pick you up, scrape you up, load you into a white van. They'll turn on their lights as if this were something to celebrate. They'll make a party of your demise. They'll run a photo of your mangled legs, the half that's left of the motorcycle that got you there. They'll welcome you to their heaven of statistics, talk to your wife on the news. Some two-bit cop or official Published by USF Scholarship: a digital repository @ Gleeson Library Geschke Center, 2014 37

will come on all slicked-up to tell how stupid you were to ride without a helmet, as if the small amount of living we do in that dark place we call the brain was something worth protecting. Listen to what I'm saying. I come home from eight hours of picking things up and putting them back down. I don't go home to read Russian novels. I don't play chess with the wife. I ride to the tavern and drink shots and beers; I take my bike out on Route Eight, crack that throttle so wide my wrist aches. There's something about speed. It's as if you could catch up with time, like if you went fast enough you couldn't be caught, couldn't be seen. Last night, past midnight, I felt the tires flatten against pavement, heard that silence when everything begins to glitter, cleansed of sound, cleansed of the crank and thrust of words that keep telling it in your ear there are limits to what you can do, as if your body would flake into light, as if you'd dissolve in the wind, string out behind like the rap of the engine, as if your eyes would press back in your heads and see pain, something pure, more real than this city of excuses we ride through. 38 http://repository.usfca.edu/ontarioreview/vol23/iss1/9

The Arena of Civilization after Mark Tobey In Tobey's "Arena of Civilization," men and women lounge and work in a four-tier building beneath a dome already invaded by chaos lines etched by the imagination or god, lines like birds scattering, fever thoughts, the word repeated and repeated until emptied of meaning. In every room of our lives a man or woman languishes, or several conspire around a small table. New plans for raising the dome? The hieroglyphs of purpose remain indecipherable. Without a god or some final goal, what is human striving? Are these the four tiers of the brain? Civilization the dream, the form that follows man? Or are these great men and women not lounging or conspiring, but sharing wine, comforting each other while the dome collapses and chaos rushes in? There is no telling. The petals of our thoughts unfold, but in that scarlet, no answer. In the falcon's stoop or the merest sigh, no balm. Our lives are a web of small purposes, the stunned rhetoric of business: "fast bucks," "futures," "investments." Today I envied Milton his god, the sure touch of his line, the pure righteousness of each syllable creeping heavenward. Or John Donne in his colloquie, his thought "immediate as the odor of a rose." Published by USF Scholarship: a digital repository @ Gleeson Library Geschke Center, 2014 39

In Tobey's "Arena of Civilization" we live in a small, public building like clerks unmoved by the brimstone sky. Think of Monet, his bourgeois weekends, boats drawn to the dock, fattened by shadow, young lovers gazing out as they had to at the waters, currents of thin color pooling in the shade of willows. Is such intelligence a happy accident? Is this the pleasure of death, of life ending in the pastel present? Does civilization rise defiant towards the shock of whatever hovers Platonic behind the sky? Or downward, trenched deeper against whatever may be true? I think of Millet's weed pullers, how each peasant was pure, some focused swatch of sadness oblivious under the pale sky. How as a woman leaned to earth she knew nothing but the single gesture required. Required, as a chant requires a gesture of voice a falling in pitch that is neither note nor breath to end. As the guitar loses its notes in its own black throat; as a thrush will swallow its song until it seems the bird is made of sound. Like a carpenter who is a poet, who is a poet before he is a man, as if he could speak himself alive. "Man dwells poetically," wrote Holderlin, and Heidegger agreed, who could breathe not a note from his tired lungs. Like my brother, seven years gone, who had no purpose but mine: to achieve some small perfection the shift from third to fourth, http://repository.usfca.edu/ontarioreview/vol23/iss1/9 40

the front wheel lifted; the exact taunt to quicken a room into life; or the switchback leaned to the edge of traction, the kickstand sparking like a meteor. No god. Perhaps. Or, if so, a god who understands wonder, who leans each corner with us, marvelling at the sudden grace of his creations, how even he was not expecting such beauty: porpoises curving silver from the waves, the gymnast whirling over the pommels, the artist taking a knife to the canvas to carve an ochre room, a man standing calmly at its edge while a colorful, abstract violence batters through the outside walls. Published by USF Scholarship: a digital repository @ Gleeson Library Geschke Center, 2014 41