Narrative Poem - Alan Wichink Kruit Wednesday, December 05, 2012 2:48 PM La Noche Triste 1 This poem is about an event, 2 About when the Spanish were sent, 3 To the newly discovered land, 4 So they could bring back something grand, 5 To please their king in Spain. 6 7 La Noche Triste it was called, 8 Takes place in a city that's walled, 9 About a man with lots of greed, 10 And takes more then he needs, 11 At the attack of the Aztec capital, 12 13 It was spring 1519 14 It wasn't quite a pleasant scene 15 Cortes set fire to his own ship 16 Crackled, crackled, with a swoosh of a whip, 17 Marching through the forest to the center, 18 19 A tribe was met along the way, 20 But they didn't want to turn away, 21 Instead they got ready for war, 22 And rain started to pour, 23 Even the sky was sad, 24 25 The Spanish started drawing their gun, 26 The war has now really begun, 27 Bang and bang then the bullet flew, 28 And the bullet stuck to them like glue, 29 The sky started turning grey, 30 31 Marching through the forest to the center, 32 Marching through the forest to the center, 33 At last they met a glorious town, 34 Where a person wore a wonderful crown, 35 The sun is shining again 36 37 The town was like a gold mine, 38 Although the Spanish thought 39 The emperor has brought 40 Them all feathers 41 42 Cortes was as angry as a tiger 43 He wanted lots of gold, 44 So then he got a hold, 45 Of the Aztec emperor, 46 47 Like a storm the Spanish raided, 48 Breaking down the door, 49 Rain started pouring to the floor, 50 The clouds covered the sun, 51 52 The Spanish have done it 53 The town is now theirs, 54 The heaven is in tears, 55 Is this the end of Aztec, 56 57 The Aztec immediately rebelled, 58 And the Spanish turned and fled, 59 But it left many dead, 60 Under the starry sky, 61 Poetry Page 1
62 The stars with like the eyes, 63 Of the god watching above, 64 To give the Aztecs their love, 65 As they rebuild their town, 66 67 This poem is about an event, 68 About when the Spanish were sent, 69 To the newly discovered land, 70 So they could bring back something grand, 71 To please their king in Spain. 72 73 La Noche Triste it was called, 74 Takes place in a city that's walled, 75 About a man with lots of greed, 80 And takes more then he needs, 81 At the attack of the Aztec capital, Use this checklist to make sure that you have covered each component: I explain my creative process from start to finish for this narrative (original idea, major changes, any feedback given by partners, etc). I explain why I chose each of the five (or more) poetic devices for this narrative I explain why I believe these poetic devices are effective in my poem and I cite specifically where I use them with quotations. I talk about how I have structured my poem and why I think it is important. I explain both the literal meaning of the poem and my ideas about how the poem figurative meaning as well. Analysis 1 Sunday December the 2nd 2012 Today I brainstormed some ideas about what my poem should be about, how long it should be and what type of poetic devices I should use. I am really interested in the past so I figured I should do a poem about something in the past. I chose La Noche Triste or The Sad Night and it was about how the Aztecs managed to rebel and take back their capital city. I thought that I should start the poem when they are still fighting and then end the poem when the war has stopped. I will probably use foreshadowing, personification, onomatopoeias, simile and repetition. My poem won't be that long, about 8 to 11 stanzas. Analysis 2 Wednesday December the 5th 2012 Today I wrote 2 stanzas for my I used the rhyme scheme of A A B B C. I used my first alliteration in the last line of stanza 2 with the words "attack" and "Aztec". I am not sure if "La Noche Triste" The Sad Night is considered a personification because it is an event that happen in past so I wasn't quite sure. The first 2 stanzas are considered the introduction because it gives some background information on the topic. Analysis 3 Thursday December the 6th 2012 Today I worked on the poem a lot. I managed to finish another 2 and a half stanzas. I added a few onomatopoeia on lines 16 and 27 with the words "crackled" and "bang". I also showed my work to the other Alan and he said that it was good. I am happy to hear that. I also have another personification in stanza 4 on line 23. It said "even the sky was sad". My rhyme scheme hasn't changed. It is still A A B B C. Analysis 4 Saturday December the 8th 2012 Today I worked on my poem a bit. I think I am almost done now and will work on it tomorrow. I added a lot of similes into my There is 1 on line 37 and another on line 42. I also used repetition to show that they are still marching to find the gold in lines 31 and 32. It is a repeat of the line 17. Line 34 is blank because I couldn't think of a line to put in there. In stanza 7 I started changing the rhyme scheme. It is now A B B C and there are only 4 lines in a stanza. I didn't use any foreshadowing yet but I was thinking of making the sky turn dark like something bad is going to happen. Analysis 5 Sunday December the 9th 2012 Today I finished my The poem has more stanzas then I thought. I used more simile on lines 47 and 62. I finally used foreshadowing when the clouds cover the sun. Then the sky turns dark so something terrible is going to happen. I didn't put so much personification in the last part of the There was only "the heaven is in tears" and the star has eyes. The last 2 stanzas are a repetition of the first 2 stanzas. I am really proud of Poetry Page 2
my Criterion A: Content (receptive and productive) Level Content Task Specific Clarifications 1-2 Very limited understanding; little / no awareness of author s choices; lacks detail, development, support. Creative work shows very limited imagination and uses few literary features Incorrect / no use of literary terms. 3-4 Limited understanding; sometimes shows awareness of the author s choices; not enough detail, development or support. Creative work shows limited imagination and sensitivity. Occasional use of literary terms. 5-6 Sufficient understanding; shows awareness of the author s choices; adequate detail, development, support Creative work shows some imagination and sensitivity. Usually accurate and appropriate use of literary terms. 7-8 Good understanding; shows good understanding of the author s choices; substantial detail, development and support. Creative work shows imagination and sensitivity. Relevant literary terms are used accurately and appropriately. 9-10 Excellent understanding; shows excellent understanding of the author s choices; sophisticated detail, development and support. Creative work shows a high degree of imagination. Excellent use of literary terms. The poet shows no awareness of narrative poetry in this analysis. The narrative in this poem shows no imagination in the The poet shows very little awareness of The narrative in this poem shows little to no imagination throughout the The poet shows an awareness of narrative poetry in this analysis. The narrative in this poem is imaginative in some areas but also has some stanzas or sections that won t work with the rest of the The poet shows an a good understanding of The narrative in this poem is imaginative and has meaning that goes beyond a literal reading at some points. The poet shows an excellent understanding of The narrative in this poem is very imaginative and has meaning that goes well beyond a literal reading. Criterion B: Organization Level Organization Task Specific Clarifications 1-2 Generally disorganized; not in a logical order Paragraphing and transitions are very weak No attention is paid to critical apparatus* 3-4 Shows the beginnings of organization; lacks significant logical order Paragraphing and transitions are weak little attention is paid to critical apparatus* The poem has no discernible plan. The reader cannot identify a style or layout for the There is no conclusion for The poet has not used ANY of the required The poem does not use rhyme and rhythm. The poem is poorly planned and organized in many areas. The reader has a lot of difficulty recognizing a style and layout for The poet has no conclusion for The poet has used at least ONE of the required The poem has erratic use of rhyme and rhythm. Poetry Page 3
5-6 Basically organized, clear and coherent; arguments presented in The poem is planned and organized in some a logical manner; areas but lacking in others. The reader has Paragraphing and transitions are apparent difficulty recognizing a style and layout for this Some attention is paid to critical apparatus* The poet has ended the poem at a conclusion but the conclusion is not fully clear. The poet has used at least TWO of the required 7-8 Usually well-organized, clear and coherent; arguments presented in a thoughtful and logical manner Paragraphing and transitions help to develop ideas; Sufficient attention is paid to critical apparatus* 9-10 Consistently well-organized, clear and coherent; arguments presented in a perceptive and persuasive manner Paragraphing and transitions help to develop ideas Sophisticated use of critical apparatus* The poem uses rhyme and rhythm consistently, with occasional lapses. The poem is well planned and organized. The reader can see that the poet is has thought about the style and layout. The poet has ended the poem at a conclusion to the story. The poet has used at least THREE of the required poetic devices discussed on the task sheet. The poem used rhyme and rhythm consistently. The poem is wonderfully planned and well organized. The reader can see that the poet is thoughtful in creating the style and layout. The poet has ended the poem at a clear conclusion to the story. The poet has used at least FIVE of the required The poem makes purposeful use of rhyme and rhythm. Criterion C: Style and Language Mechanics Level Language Task Specific Clarifications 1-2 Vocabulary often inappropriate and limited; very frequent errors* often hinder communication There is little attempt to use suitable register Oral/ presentation work shows little or no skill. 3-4 Vocabulary sometimes inappropriate and somewhat varied; regular errors* hinder communication. There is an attempt to use suitable register. Oral/ presentation work shows some skill. 5-6 Vocabulary usually appropriate and generally varied; some errors* sometimes hinder communication. Often uses suitable register. The poet does not use poetic devices or The style of language chosen has no connection to the feeling that the poet wants. The poet makes several errors with language in The poet uses only one or no poetic devices and very little descriptive language to tell his or her narrative. The style of language chosen rarely creates the feeling that the poet wants. The poet makes consistent errors with language in The poet uses a few poetic devices and some The style of language chosen creates some of the Poetry Page 4
Oral/ presentation work shows adequate skill. 7-8 Vocabulary appropriate and varied; occasional errors* rarely hinder communication. Consistent use of suitable register. Oral/ presentation work shows good skill. 9-10 Vocabulary always appropriate and greatly varied; very infrequent errors*. Suitable register mastered. Oral/ presentation work shows excellent skill. feeling that the poet wants. The poet makes some consistent errors with language in The poet uses a good range of poetic devices and The style of language chosen creates the feeling that the poet wants. The poet makes a few errors with language in The poet uses an excellent range of poetic devices and descriptive language to tell his or her narrative. The style of language intentionally creates an impact on the reader. The poet makes very few errors with language in Poetry Page 5