Pointing up to heaven What do you do if you are about to start university and you have a couple of months to spare? You are off on holiday of course. So it was with Trevor and me. The experience was made the more pleasurable by the fact that Trevor s dad had given him an old Austin A35 van. It was grey in colour with one of the windows broken. When you drove this car you had to speak up because the sound of the engine sounded like a thousand hornets. But it had a lot of space in the back so we could pile in the camping gear. We set off to Dover and the continent. We were going to drive through France to the mountains of north Spain. (A distance of about 700 miles) It was amazing that this old banger held together. First, we made it to the sandy beaches of Biarritz where we sat around sampling the local cuisine and joining in with beach volley ball. Time to move off, Trevor said. So the next day we packed up and, to the almost continuous sounds of A Whiter Shade of Pale, we cruised to the Spanish border crossing. Entering Spain felt like felt another world. It was quiet. Nobody was at the station that we passed. Everywhere the hills were littered with advertising hoardings, telling us to buy a Spanish washing machine and eat Spanish olives. We needed to buy some food. We stopped at various roadside stores. All were closed. It was of course siesta time. We approached the little town from the mountains. Where is the square? It is over there. And it has a nice big shady tree we can lie under after we have eaten something. We not only ate something but we bought a large bottle of the local red wine or two. Waking from our long nap Trevor pointed to a sign nearby and said, It looks like there will be flamenco and dancing in the square tonight. The dancing and singing went on well into the early hours. We were even able to join in with one or two songs but we had less success persuading the local Spanish girls to dance with us. I suppose we should head off and find a place to sleep. I told Trevor. I remember seeing a nice grassy verge in the hills just before we descended into the town. Ok then. Let s go there. We eventually came to the spot I had seen before but we weren t entirely sure if it was the same spot since it was pitch black. Well it looks alright, I think, Trevor said.
Yes come on, let s just reverse on to the grass! Oh, that we had checked first! Oh, that Trevor had made sure that it was safe! As I went backwards suddenly the back wheels dropped. There was a crash and a bang and the front of the car turned upwards, toward heaven! In stunned silence we sat looking up at the stars and the clear night sky. Oh my God, I think we have just gone down a cliff! All our stuff had fallen backwards and was leaning against the back door of the car. Getting out of the car was difficult. The door kept closing. Eventually, we were standing on the ground to the side It looks bad, doesn t it? Yes let s see if we can push the car. We huffed and we puffed but the car didn t budge. We tried again It s no good. We will just have to grab the tent and sleep out here. So that is what we did. The following morning we surveyed the damage. I had indeed reversed the car over a small cliff. What shall we do? It must be ten miles into town. We sat on a stone beside the road contemplating our fate, when we noticed a lorry descending down the twisting road from above. Well, we had better stop the lorry. Perhaps he can give us a lift into town. We waved our arms. The lorry stopped. Thank you for stopping, I said. We have... But before I could finish my sentence the truck driver butted in. No hablo Inglés. Hablo español Oh. Ummm Necesitamos ayuda. Venga y vea errr nuestro coche se ha roto. Our car is broken please help us. And so the big, burly Spanish lorry driver came over to the cliff to see what had happened. He looked down and for a moment he stood totally still and then holding his large paunched stomach he burst out in laughter. Ah ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Oh, ho, ho, ho! This went on for some considerable time. Finally when he had calmed down he seemed to mutter something and then went over to the road. Another lorry was coming down. The Spanish lorry driver waved it down. Out popped what appeared to be his friend. After chatting for a minute or two the burly driver led his friend to the small cliff and before he could say anything they both burst out in laughter together. It was disconcerting. And then when they went back to road and waited for a third lorry we were really starting to get a bit worried. The lorry driver came over to the cliff and again we could see the strange site of these three large men laughing their pants off. Finally, the original driver came over to us and said, No te preocupes,...no te preocupes... no worry inglés The three of them went down the hill to the base of the cliff and got hold of the back of the car. OK, Uno, dos, tres... We could hardly believe it. The three large drivers took hold of the bumper and lifted the back of the car up and pushed it up the cliff and on to the grass verge. Ahí tienes...buenas tardes inglés y buena suerte. Good bye inglés and good luck.
Whereupon, with our mouths almost touching the ground and still laughing, they gave us a big hug and disappeared into their lorries with the words, No beba el vino tinto...el vino tinto no es bueno. Next time no drink red wine! Strangely, there was almost no damage to the car. It started right away. And hereafter did we check that there was no cliff behind? We did. And did we drive after we had drunk the local red wine? We did not. We did not want to be left sitting in our car again, holding the steering wheel, and looking up at that starry sky. Vocabulary Hornet, local cuisine, grassy verge, pitch black, surveyed the damage, butted in, disconcerting What do the following expressions mean? 1. It was amazing that this old banger held together. (line 15) 2. We huffed and we puffed but the car didn t budge. (line 46) 3. We sat at the side of the road, contemplating our fate. (line 50) 4. He was laughing his pants off. (line 67) 5. With our mouths almost touching the ground (line73) Comprehension 1. If you had a couple of months to spare before starting university would you go off on holiday? What kind of holiday would you go on? 2. If you were asked to give a date when this story happened what would you say and why? 3. Does everyone in Spain have a Spanish washing machine and do they all eat Spanish olives 4. Why do you think stores do not open during siesta? 5. Why do you think the two boys did not have success in persuading Spanish girls to dance with them? 6. Have you ever done something that resulted in stunned silence? 7. Has there ever been a time when you have contemplated your fate? 8. How do you think the two boys felt when they saw the lorry drivers laughing at their situation? 9. Take a guess as to what the van weighed. 10. What is the moral of this story?
Phrasal verb Look at these phrasal verbs: You are off on holiday. We set off to Dover. Time to move off Sometimes the preposition off can give a feeling of movement away from something Fill in the blanks with the correct phrasal verbs in the correct form: go, call, see, drop, fall, put, take, hold 1. The family were at the train station to...him... 2. Tell the taxi driver to...you...near the post office 3. The lights...... and it became pitch black. 4. The football game was...... because of bad weather. 5. Sales of cold drinks have...... this year. 6. If the rain...... we will be able to have our picnic. 7. The aeroplane will...... in thirty minutes 8. The meeting was... off until Thursday. Formal/informal style When we tell a story we can tell it in an informal style. An informal style is more of a chatty one, almost like someone is speaking to you. It is sometimes humorous. There is usually dialogue mixed with narrative. Questions may be used. There may be expression which seem like they are slang and the rules of grammar may not be so strictly followed. Can you write down some of the informal style used in this story.
Role play Working in a small group choose one of the following role plays: 1. You have been on a holiday in a boat. You have had such a wonderful time. You are now relaxing on deck when you hear this crunching sound. Oh, no! You seem to have hit a rock. The boat is beginning to lean. What do you do? Act out the scene. 2. You are on holiday in a rented car. It is a nice day and you are enjoying the scenery. Suddenly you hit a pot hole in the road. Then you swerve and crash into a tree. What do you do? Who do you phone? 3 You are going to the beautiful island of Tenerife with your children for one week. You have just arrived at the hotel. You go to the check-in desk. But there is a problem. The hotel has overbooked and there are no rooms for two days. The hotel is sending you To another hotel. The trouble is this hotel is five miles from the sea. You are not happy. What do you say? What do you do?
Teacher s notes This story happened just before I started university. It is really a story about stupidity. I have told this story to a lower level in a more dramatic form simplifying the vocabulary. When reading the dialogue spoken by the Spanish lorry drive do gesticulate with your hands. You may like to ask a student to do a raucous laugh. I haven t really made any changes to the story I originally wrote. The story is at the intermediate level or approximately B1 in CEFRL Comprehension questions The comprehension questions should be straight forward. But they have been written in the form that students will need to think before they answer. Phrasal verbs It used to be that students would study lists of phrasal verbs. It looks easy but you may find that many get them wrong. Formal/informal style Students may select some of the following: a. What do you do if you are about to start university and you have a couple of months to spare? (question and answer) b. You go off on holiday of course. (phrasal verb) c. It sounded like a thousand hornets. (metaphor) d. It was amazing that this old banger held together. (colloquial language) e. We made it to (phrasal verb) f. We approached the little town from the mountains. Where is the square? (mix of dialogue and narrative) g. Waking from our long nap Trevor pointed to a sign nearby and said, It looks like there will be flamenco and dancing in the square tonight. (Mix dialogue and narrative) h. We huffed and we puffed but the car didn t budge (colloquial language) i. He looked down and for a moment he stood totally still and then holding his large paunched stomach he burst out in laughter. Ah ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Oh, ho, ho, ho! (humour) j. Out popped what appeared to be his friend. (colloquial language) k. Oh, that we had checked first! Oh, that Trevor had made sure that it was safe! (exclamation)
The role plays You can divide the students into three groups and allocate role plays. I prefer to let them chose. (Make sure the room you are in is big enough for three groups to practise in) Role play 1. This could be chaotic as some of the students perish overboard in the deep waters! Role Play 2. Interesting to see who the students decide to call. It would be a good idea to call the police and ask them to make a report to include the fact that the large pot hole caused the accident otherwise the rental car company may charge for damage Role play 3. It could be fun if some of the students take on the role of children and they start whining!