The (F)Fence. a ten minute comedy. by James Hanson. Copyright January 2017 James Hanson and Off The Wall Play Publishers.

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Transcription:

The (F)Fence a ten minute comedy by James Hanson Copyright January 2017 James Hanson and Off The Wall Play Publishers http://offthewallplays.com This script is provided for reading purposes only. Professionals and amateurs are hereby advised that it is subject to royalty. It is fully protected under the laws of the United States of America, the British Empire, including the Dominion of Canada, South Africa and all other countries of the Copyright Union. All rights, including but not limited to professional, amateur, film, radio, and all other media (including use on the worldwide web) and the rights of translation into foreign languages are strictly reserved; and any unauthorized use of the material may subject the user to any and all applicable civil and criminal penalties. For any information about royalties or to apply for a performance license please click the following link: http://offthewallplays.com/royalties-and-licensing-of-plays-sold-by-off-the-wall-plays/

Cast of Characters Kate: Maddie: Daniel: Roger: About 22, Roger s wife About 33, Daniel s wife About 21, Maddie s husband About 33, Kate s husband Scene Backyards Time An afternoon

ACT I/SCENE 1 At Rise: The stage is split in two by a fence. On one side is folding clothes from a laundry bag into a basket. And on the other side is lighting a grill. These things can be re-worked according to preference. ( approaches and hugs her. approaches and shakes his hand. and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) Kate. I was wondering when you were going to show up. My husband had me cooking lunch for him. Meatloaf and Lasagna. That s a big lunch. Does he make you do that everyday? He says because I m such a great cook, I should be using my talents to feed him well. Well, I m a terrible cook so my hubby is not so demanding. You see, that s where you erred. You should have hidden your cooking skills. So what do you cook for Daniel? Rice, and store bought patties. He prefers to eat out. You know I wore that black dress I told you about. Wow! Daniel loved it. I think he fell in love with me all over again. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.)

CONTINUED: 2. How did things go with Maddie last night? She wore that black dress. It was absolutely hideous. I was so ashamed to walk next to her. I was actually walking at a distance... like I don t don t know her, she s just walking beside me. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I bet he was smiling all the time. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated. I had this frown that never left me for the whole night. I was glad it was night time. Kate has this dress that makes me shudder also. Something that s so 1497. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I have this dress that Roger just adores. Whenever I wear it, his eyes just lights up, and I feel like I m ballroom dancing with him. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I don t know how to tell her that dress is horrendous. Women, huh. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) We have such romantic husbands. We do. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.)

CONTINUED: 3. Are you ever pressured to be romantic? The last time I went to a chic flick with Maddie, I mentally vomited all that nonsense half through the film. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I went to see this chic flick with Daniel, it was so touching he started crying. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I was crying Roger, because I was in so much PAIN. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) He finished my whole box of Kleenex. (showing Maddie the ring on her index finger) Roger bought me this ring. That looks expensive. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I had to dip into my savings because of Kate. She conned me into buying this ring for her. She said she wouldn t sleep in the same bed with me unless I bought this ring she saw in a magazine. After two days, I broke. That s sad. Tell me about it. I literally threw the money at her.

CONTINUED: 4. Sort of like rage quitting. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I m happy for you. Thanks. Our anniversary is coming up, and I m really excited. Do you think he ll get you something? He always has, but I m not pressuring him or anything. He has done a lot for me already. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) Our anniversary is coming up, and I m broke. Do you have to get her something? If I don t, you ll never see me again, buddy. I ll get the axe. I took Maddie to this crumby restaurant for our anniversary. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) Daniel took me to a fancy restaurant for our anniversary. It was really romantic. Tell me more. We walked to the restaurant, and the stars were aligned just right, and we were holding hands. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.)

CONTINUED: 5. On our way to the restaurant, she held my hand so tight it hurt. It was 2 o clock in the morning, and the streets were deserted. Why did you choose that restaurant? It is the only restaurant I know that offers great food for under twenty bucks. But it s located in the middle of nowhere. And Taxi drivers are afraid to go there, so we had to walk from the train station. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) The food was great. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) The food was horrible. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) So I hope you have your own little love story for your anniversary. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) Learn from me. Don t make that mistake. Kate would never forgive for something like that. Neither would her mother. They talk about everything. She shares a equal part is this relationship. Did I tell you that she s coming over to spend a week? No. She s making her yearly inspection, so If I mess up my anniversary I ll have two women that will be angry with me.

CONTINUED: 6. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) My mother s coming to spend a week with us. I like her. She s such a nice person. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) I dread this time of year. Seeing her judgmental face makes me shudder. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) Roger really likes her. His face just lights up when she enters the house. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) One week is all I m thinking. One week... In-laws, huh? How did you escape yours, though? They live Canada, I moved to New Jersey. And if need be, I ll move to Alaska. ( and are in a frozen-like state while and are animated.) When are your in-laws coming over? I ve never seen any of them. The trip is too much for them. They live in Canada. I ve suggested to Daniel that we go visit them but he says he s not up for the trip. But we will, eventually.