Foundations and Models

F Foundations and Models TM for Proficiency TM CURRICULUM ASSOCIATES, Inc.

Part I: foundations A. Using Words in Writing Lesson 1: Concrete and Abstract Nouns..4 Lesson 2: Noun Suffixes...6 Lesson 3: Possessive Nouns...8 Lesson 4: Subject and Object Pronouns...10 Lesson 5: Pronoun Antecedents...12 Lesson 6: Verb Tenses...14 Lesson 7: Verb Phrases...16 Lesson 8: Subject-Verb Agreement...18 Lesson 9: More Subject-Verb Agreement...20 Lesson 10: Adjectives...22 Lesson 11: Adverbs...24 Lesson 12: Exact Adjectives and Adverbs...26 Lesson 13: Homophones...28 B. Giving Form to Writing Lesson 14: Sentence Fragments...30 Lesson 15: Joining Sentences...32 Lesson 16: Joining with Subordinating Conjunctions...34 Lesson 17: Joining with Relative Pronouns...36 Lesson 18: Joining with Appositives...38 Lesson 19: Run-on and Rambling Sentences...40 Lesson 20: Unnecessary Words and Phrases...42 C. Giving Voice to Writing Lesson 22: Capitalization: People...46 Lesson 23: Capitalization: Places...48 Lesson 24: Capitalization: Things...50 Lesson 25: Punctuation: Commas...52 Lesson 26: Punctuation: Apostrophes...54 Lesson 27: Punctuation: Quotation Marks and Italics...56 D. Giving Structure to Writing Lesson 28: Paragraphs: Main Idea and Details...58 Lesson 29: Paragraphs: Leads and Transitions...60 E. Revising and Editing Lesson 30: Proofreading...62 Prepare for a Test, Part I...64 Part II: models Lesson 31: Descriptive Essays...76 Lesson 32: Personal Narratives...86 Lesson 33: Fictional Narratives...96 Lesson 34: Expository Essays...106 Lesson 35: Persuasive Essays...116 Lesson 36: Summaries...126 Lesson 37: Research Reports...138 Prepare for a Test, Part II...141 Lesson 21: Varying Sentences...44

LESSON 1 Think About When you speak or write, you use nouns to communicate clearly. Nouns tell which person you mean, where something is, or what something is. A noun is a word that names a person, place, or thing. A concrete noun names a person, place, or thing that can be seen or touched. These words are concrete nouns: teacher, Mr. Waters, city, Boston, document, Constitution. An abstract noun names an idea, which cannot be seen or touched. These words are abstract nouns: bravery, honesty, humor, imagination, education, Tuesday. These concrete nouns name people: ballerina, teenager, grandchild, chemist, Alma, Ms. Robbins, George Washington Carver, Sir Walter Raleigh, President Lincoln. These concrete nouns name places: observatory, outcropping, fortress, stadium, Mall of America, Eurasia, Namibia, Mount Vesuvius, Hawaii, Coney Island. These concrete nouns name things: cobblestone, nectar, galaxy, tornado, Liberty Bell, Nobel Prize, Brooklyn Bridge. These abstract nouns name ideas: courtesy, anger, bewilderment, victory, companionship, embarrassment, sympathy. 4 Study Study Model A Read the biographical sketch. Concrete nouns are red, and abstract nouns are blue. With a cardboard box for his space capsule, young John Herrington imagined the thrill of the launch. He dreamed of one day flying through space. Because his father owned an airplane, John had already had many opportunities to fly. Later, John turned his flying experience into a career as a test pilot. His courage and interest in flight served him well. On November 23, 2002, Mission Specialist John Herrington became the first Native American astronaut. In the first sentence, the words box and John Herrington are concrete nouns. They can be seen or touched. The word experience is an abstract noun. It names an idea, which cannot be seen or touched. Find another abstract noun in this sentence. Test pilot and Mission Specialist are compound nouns. A compound noun is made up of two or more words. Mission Specialist is capitalized because it is a title before a name.

Practice A Label each concrete noun C and each abstract noun A. 1. truce 6. leopard 2. janitor 7. Rocky Mountains 3. cleanliness 8. inexperience 4. peanut butter 9. eternity 5. sophomore 10. granite LESSON 1 B Read each sentence. Then write and label the concrete noun and the abstract noun in each sentence. 1. Uncle Todd fixed the troublesome problem. 2. We all appreciate the loyalty of our friends. 3. The firefighter s bravery earned her a medal. 4. They enjoyed the beauty of the Grand Canyon. 5. My favorite luxury is chocolate. 6. I hope to increase my knowledge in high school. C Read the paragraph. Write the 10 concrete nouns and 7 abstract nouns. Carrie mows lawns every Saturday. She enjoys any work in the yard. Pushing with all her energy against the lawn mower on the tall grass, she feels the muscles in her arms, legs, and abdomen strengthen. When Carrie finishes, she feels great accomplishment. As she looks back, her fatigue melts away because she s filled with pride in a job well done. A concrete noun names a person, place, or thing that can be seen or touched. An abstract noun names an idea or quality that cannot be seen or touched. Write Write a biographical sketch of yourself, a person you know, or a person you know about. Help readers get to know your subject by including concrete and abstract nouns in your writing. Writing Tip Too many abstract nouns can make your writing confusing. Use them sparingly. Our expectation is that the possibility of new school rules will be discussed. (confusing) We will probably discuss the new school rules. (clearer) 5

PART II In Lessons 31 37 you write. Use what you ve learned in Part I to WRITE! LESSON 31 When you tell about a person, place, or thing, you give a description. When you write a descriptive essay,you ll use strong, colorful words to create an image, or picture, in the readers minds. Here is a sample writing prompt for a descriptive essay. Write an essay describing your favorite spot at home. Read this descriptive essay, which was written in response to the prompt. Then read the Writing Tips to learn more about descriptive essays. Writing Tips Show instead of tell. Include enough details to help your readers personally get to know the person, place, or thing you re describing. Before writing, ask questions such as: What can I see? Hear? Smell? Taste? Feel? These sensory details will make your writing come to life. Give your descriptive essay an interesting title. Plan a clear beginning, middle, and ending. Begin with a strong lead and introduce your subject in a topic sentence. Use a sensible way to organize your writing, such as spatial order or order of importance. Use transitional words and phrases to connect paragraphs and to make your writing flow smoothly from one idea to the next. End with a strong statement that sums up your impressions of the subject. Choose exact words, forceful verbs, and comparisons to create a precise picture of your subject in your readers mind. My Front Porch My favorite spot at home is my front porch. It has wide side walls that are topped each summer with flower boxes filled with fragrant flowers. The porch has six gray wooden steps that are worn smooth with the footsteps of friends and family. The top step is my front-row seat. From there I watch the neighborhood action. I listen to the laughter of the twins across the street as they play basketball. Old Mr. Terry next door mutters to himself as he works on his car in the driveway. Joggers running past give a nod and keep on going. The dog walkers always stop so I can pet their dogs. From my porch I yell Hi! to my best friend Tony, who lives half way down the block. On summer evenings I wave him over, and we wait on the porch until we hear the tinny tune announcing the arrival of the ice cream truck. The driver always pulls up to the curb in front of my porch. Tony and I buy ice cream, and then we enjoy our sweet dessert right there on my porch, my favorite spot. 76

USING GRAPHIC ORGANIZERS Before you write, use graphic organizers to help yourself think about, gather, and sort information for your descriptive essay. The writer of the descriptive essay on page 76 might have used a Senses Chart, such as the one below. Sight Sound Taste Touch Smell flower boxes, twins playing basketball, Mr. Terry working on his car, joggers nodding, people walking dogs laughter of twins, calling to Tony, tinny tune of ice cream truck sweet ice cream smooth steps, petting dogs fragrant flowers A Senses Chart helps writers gather and organize information about the five senses. Then writers can use this information to create vivid images for readers. The writer of the descriptive essay on page 76 also might have used a Describing Words Web, such as the one below. If you had been the writer, what words would you have used to describe the front porch? Using the Senses Chart as a guide, fill in the ovals with colorful describing words. My Front Porch A Describing Words Web helps writers brainstorm colorful words to create vivid images. 77

TAKING A LOOK AT Descriptive descriptive Essays Score: Read the descriptive essay below, which was written in response to the prompt on page 76. This description scored a 4 on a scale that ranges from 1 to 4, with 4 being the best. Then read the comments and think about why this description scored a 4. 1 Your Turn A Gathering Place The smells, sights, and sounds of my family s kitchen make this my favorite place at home. Before you even walk into our kitchen, you ll notice the strong smell of coffee. From dawn until the last kid crawls into bed at night, a coffee pot sputters and sizzles on our kitchen counter. For me, the smell of coffee always brings memories of my family in the kitchen. This is where we celebrate good times, solve family problems, and discuss new ideas. Once in the kitchen, you quickly notice its colors. Tomato-red counters are on top of olive-stained cabinets. Shiny white appliances stands along the walls. A six-foot pine table stretches like a stage along the length of the kitchen. You can see bits of its honey color from beneath piles of schoolwork, mail, newspapers, and assorted glasses, bowls, and dishes. I always enjoy this familiar confusion. Noise is the third impression you get from our kitchen. Friends and family constantly clomp in and out and my younger brothers and sisters argue and play games. At the noisiest times I want to shout, Quiet! Mostly I don t mind. I like listening to my family s laughter and talk. When I m in my place in the kitchen, I feel like I m in the heart of my family s universe. 78 2 Now it s your turn to help the writer. Find and fix the errors in the writing. Go back to the pages in green if you need help. 1. Find and fix the error in subject-verb agreement. See pp. 18 19. 2. Find and fix the compound sentence that is missing a comma. See pp. 32 33. Teacher Comments Your opening sentence grabs my attention with a strong lead. Good! I like the way you pull me into the scene with details. Colorful words like crawls and shiny help me imagine the scene. Forceful verbs, like sputters and sizzles, help me hear the coffee brewing. Comparisons, like stretches like a stage, help create a vivid picture. Your final sentence provides an effective conclusion. Partner Comments 4 3 The details you gave made me feel like I was really in your kitchen. Great description!

Score: Read the descriptive essay and the comments that follow. Think about why this description scored a 3. 1 Our Gathering Place My family s kitchen is my favorite place. You can always smell coffee because a coffee pot is on all day long. The smell of coffee always reminds me of my family in our kitchen. Our kitchen is colorful. It has red counters and it has green cabinets and a green tile floor. It also has white appliances along the walls. It has a long honey-colored pine table. It usually has a jumble of papers and dishes on it. Our kitchen is noisy. Friends and family clomp Your Turn Now it s your turn to help the writer. Find and fix the errors in the writing. Go back to the pages in green if you need help. 1. Find the paragraph error. Mark where a new paragraph should begin. See pp. 58 59. 2. Find the rambling sentence.rewrite it as two shorter sentences. See pp. 40 41. 3. Find and fix the direct quotation that isn t punctuated. See pp. 56 57. 4. Find and fix the contraction error. See pp. 54 55. 5. Find and fix the error in forming a possessive noun. See pp. 8 9. in and out. My younger brothers and sisters are noisy. Sometimes I want to shout, Quiet! Most of the time I dont mind the noise. I like being with my family in our kitchen. It is the heart of my families universe. Partner Comments I liked reading about your kitchen, but I d like more details about what your family does in the kitchen. Also, too many sentences start with the word it. That makes the description a little boring. 2 3 Teacher Comments 4 Your title and first sentence connect to the prompt. Good! You ve organized your ideas in a sensible way. Your conclusion is very nice. Can you add more details about what your family does in the kitchen? See pp. 58 59 for help. Try to vary the type and length of your sentences. This will help your writing flow more smoothly. See pp. 44 45. 79

TAKING A LOOK AT DESCRIPTIve Essays continued Score: Read the descriptive essay and the comments that follow. Think about why this description scored a 2. 1 Our Kitchen I like our kitchen. I like the smell their. A coffee pot is on all day long coffee reminds me of our kitchen. Our kitchen has many colors. Its colors are red white and green. I think it should be red, white, and blue, but no one ever listens to me. Our kitchen has counters and cabinets. It has a big table with lots of papers and junk on them. Noisy kitchen. Everyone around here run in and out. My more younger brothers and sisters are very noisy. Sometimes I don t Your Turn Now it s your turn to help the writer. Find and fix the errors in the writing. Go back to the pages in green if you need help. 1. Find and fix the incorrect homophone. See pp. 28 29. 2. Find the run-on sentence.rewrite it as two shorter sentences. See pp. 40 41. 3. Find and fix the sentence with two missing commas in a series. See pp. 52 53. 4. Find and fix the pronoun that does not agree with its antecedent. See pp. 12 13. 5. Find the sentence fragment.rewrite it as a complete sentence. See pp. 30 31. 6. Find and fix the error in subject-verb agreement. See pp. 20 21. 7. Find and fix the adjective that has the incorrect comparative form. See pp. 22 23. mind. Mostly I like it. 2 Teacher Comments 4 Partner Comments I knew you were writing about a kitchen, but I just couldn t picture it. There aren t enough details for me to know why this place is special. 3 I see that you are describing your kitchen, but I need more details to picture it. What is the smell you like? What is red, white, or green? Your writing is pretty choppy. Try combining sentences so they re not all the same length. See pp. 32 39 for help. Try adding some interesting words to make your description livelier. See pp. 4 5 and 26 27. Can you add transitional words to connect your ideas? See pp. 60 61. 80

Score: Read the descriptive essay and the comments that follow. Think about why this description scored a 1. I like the smell of coffee. My Father likes coffee. Our kitchen. Fun place. It s red, green, and white and red is my favorite color. Our kitchen has a big table. The table s color is honey. All of us comes in and out. It s the most noisiest room in our house. My family they spend lots of time hear. My brothers, sister, and me play and work their. My brothers friends come too. Partner Teacher Comments Comments At first, I didn t realize that you were writing about your kitchen. You should have started your description by naming the place. Also, most of your sentences are too short. Your essay needs a title. Mention the subject of your description in the first sentence. Try to grab your readers attention with a strong lead. See pp. 60 61 for help. The kitchen you are describing sounds exciting, but I need more details to begin to picture it. Your description needs a clearer beginning, middle, and ending. Your ideas don t seem to be in any order. Try to use some exact adjectives and adverbs in your writing to make it come alive. See pp. 26 27. Try to vary the types of sentences you use. See pp. 44 45. 1 2 3 4 Your Turn Now it s your turn to help the writer. Find and fix the errors in the writing. Go back to the pages in green if you need help. 1. Find and fix the capitalization error. See pp. 46 47. 2. Find the two sentence fragments.combine them in one sentence. See pp. 30 31. 3. Find and fix the run-on sentence. See pp. 40 41. 4. Find and fix the two errors in subject-verb agreement. See pp. 18 21. 5. Find and fix the adjective that has the incorrect superlative form. See pp. 22 23. 6. Find and fix the unnecessary word. See pp. 42 43. 7. Find and fix the two incorrect homophones. See pp. 28 29. 8. Find and fix the incorrect pronoun. See pp. 10 11. 9. Find and fix the error in forming a possessive noun. See pp. 8 9. 81

USING A RUBRIC TO SCORE DESCRIPTIve essays Essays This rubric is based on a point scale of 1 to 4. It was used to score the descriptive essays on pages 78 81. Use this rubric to remember what is important in descriptive essays. A score of 4 means that the writer connects the writing directly to the prompt. almost always uses the correct forms of words. almost always uses capitalization and punctuation correctly. almost always uses clear and complete sentences and includes variety in sentences. creates a title that relates directly to the topic. introduces the subject clearly at the beginning of the description. creates a clear beginning, middle, and ending. includes many interesting details, colorful sensory words, and comparisons to create strong images. uses an appropriate system of organization, such as spatial order. begins a new paragraph for each change of idea or speaker. A score of 2 means that the writer connects the writing to the prompt in a general way. uses some incorrect forms of words. may make some errors in capitalization or punctuation. uses little variety in sentences. includes some run-on or rambling sentences or sentence fragments. creates a title that relates somewhat to the topic. presents the subject somewhere within the description. creates a description with a weak beginning, middle, or ending. includes too few interesting details, sensory words, or comparisons to create strong images. uses a weak system of organization. may make some paragraphing errors. A score of 3 means that the writer connects the writing to the prompt. usually uses the correct forms of words. usually uses capitalization and punctuation correctly. usually uses clear and complete sentences and includes variety in sentences. creates a title that relates to the topic in a general way. introduces the subject toward the beginning of the description. creates a description with a beginning, middle, and ending. includes some interesting details, sensory words, and comparisons to create images. uses an adequate system of organization. usually begins a new paragraph for each change of idea or speaker. A score of 1 means that the writer does not successfully connect the writing to the prompt. uses many incorrect forms of words. makes many errors in capitalization or punctuation. uses almost no variety in sentences. includes several run-on or rambling sentences or sentence fragments. creates a poor title or has no title at all. identifies the subject in an unclear way or not at all. creates a description without a clear beginning, middle, or ending. includes words, details, or comparisons that fail to create clear images. uses no system of organization. may make many paragraphing errors. 82

SCORING DESCRIPTIve Essays Now it s your turn to score some descriptive essays. The four descriptions on pages 83 and 84 were written in response to this prompt. Model A Model A Write an essay describing your favorite place to go in the summer. Read each descriptive essay. Write a few comments about it. Then give it a score from 1 to 4. Think about what you ve learned in this lesson as you match each description with its correct score. Our Swimming Pool My favorite place is my local pool. When I take my first dive into that sparkling cool water, everything seems better. The sound of screaming children are like a haze around me. Then I submerge. I feel the sting of chlorine in my eyes. I slide like a dolphin through the water. I feel well. I come up slowliest out of the water and shake the cool drips from my face. I will grin at the children around me and then I dive in again. Score: Comments: Model B Model B Their are children screaming. The water is cool. It feels best. Summer is hot. I can swim underwater. I can open my eyes underwater it stings a little. It is cool hear. I needs to cool down. I swim for a while. The water it is great. Score: Comments: 83

SCORING DESCRIPTIve ESSAYScontinued Model C Model C The First Dip On a scorching summer day when the heat beats down on me like an iron, there is no place I d rather be than at my local pool. Everything looks sharper, smells fresher, and even tastes better after my first plunge into the cool, sparkling blue water. Before that first dip, the buzz of screaming children annoy me. But once I submerge, I slide like a dolphin through a jumble of squirming legs. I burst threw the surface of the water and shake off the cool, wet drips. Then I grin at the playful children around me. Swimming in the pool makes me feel like myself once again. Score: Comments: Model D Model D At the pool the water sparkles it feels cool. The weather is sunny and hot out. Everything seems more better. I even like the way hot dogs taste here. I here children screaming. They are all around me. I swim underwater and my eyes sting. Then I come up out of the water. Water on my face. I smile and dive back in again. Score: Comments: 84

WRITING A descriptive Essay Now you get to write your own descriptive essay. Use the prompt below. Write an essay describing your most prized possession. When You Write Your Descriptive Essay 1. Think about what you want to write. Close your eyes and visualize your prized possession. Think about how to describe it. Ask yourself some questions. What words can best describe how this thing looks? What kind of sound, if any, does it make? Does it have a smell or taste? If I run my hand over it, what will I feel? What makes this thing so special? Use graphic organizers to gather and sort the information. 2. Write your first draft. Make sure you name your prized possession at the beginning of your description. Be sure your descriptive essay has a clear beginning, middle, and ending. 3. Read your draft. Use the checklist that your teacher will give you to review your writing. 4. Edit your descriptive essay. Make changes until your words paint a vivid picture of your prized possession. 5. Proofread your descriptive essay one last time. 6. Write a neat copy of your descriptive essay and give it to your partner. Work with a Partner 7. Read your partner s descriptive essay. 8. Score your partner s descriptive essay from 1 to 4, using the rubric on page 82. Then complete the Partner Comments sheet that your teacher will give you. Tell what you like about the description and what you think would make it better. 9. Switch papers. 10. Think about your partner s comments. Read your descriptive essay again. Make changes that you think will improve your description. 11. Write a neat final copy of your descriptive essay. Making Connections Look for descriptions in poems, books, ads, and websites. Keep a notebook of strong images that others have painted with words. Use these ideas as models for your own writing. Think about the different ways you could arrange details in a description. If you were describing a room, for example, you could use spatial order left to right, from top to bottom, or from the center out. You could also arrange the description according to the things that are most important to least important to you. Brainstorm with a friend. Think of a place that you both know well. How would you describe the place from several feet away? How would your description change if you were looking at it from an airplane? From a train passing by? Experiment with different viewpoints. 85