Once Upon A TairyFale

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Once Upon A TairyFale A One Act Play by April Wells Cast: Fairy god Sister Tinkerbelle Thumbelina Little Red Riding Hood Cinderella Jack Pinocchio Big Bad Wolf Wicked Queen Setting: Tairyfale Land Time: Past, Present & Future This Script Belongs to: 1

Scene 1 Music begins softly as the members of the audience are almost through finding their seats. Tinkerbelle and Thumbelina buzz out into the audience and begin to giggle and laugh as they tap some members on the head with their wands. After a few moments they meet back on stage and tap each other and quickly buzz off SL. Music cue Fairy god Sister enters SR seeming concerned and calls for her Tink and Thumble. She paces and realizes the audience is watching her. She stops, composes herself and says FGS Tinkerbelle! Thumbelina! (Sees audience) Oh! I m sorry. I wasn t aware there was anyone else here. Have any of you seen two little fairies fluttering about? They are about this high; they have wings and are probably carrying wands with them. No? Hmmmm I wonder what s keeping them? I ll bet your wondering why I am so worried? Well I ll tell you the story. Once upon a time a long long time ago there was a beautiful kingdom high above the white clouds, surrounded by giant beanstalks on the other side of the mystical mirror. In Tairyland the sun always shined and everyday the weather was just right. It would rain fairy dust and the snow was made of feathers that tickled all the fairies whenever it came fell up. I am the Fairy god sister and I oversee this part of Tairyfale land and all those who live here. We are the keepers of the dreams and imaginations of those who live on the other side of the mystical mirror, down beneath the clouds on the ground where the beanstalks end. Recently though we here in Tairyfale land have found ourselves in a terrible state. Nothing seems to be working right. Not our spells, not our potions, not our wishes or wands. Something has gone terribly wrong. Something is strange. Maybe the mirror has the answer. (She prepares to awake the mystical mirror) Oh I know I shouldn t be doing this but I fear there is no other choice. (Waving wand) Mirror Mirror in the sky I call you fourth please reply. Sound cue - Ahhhh mirror! It has been many years since we have called upon you but things have not been the same as of late and we need you help. Can you tell me what has happened? (BEAT) What that? The parents on the other side of the mystical mirror don t believe in us anymore? THAT S IMPOSSIBLE. They read our stories as children! (BEAT)(Seeming worried) Oh dear, television, newspapers and the inter what? Inter net? What on earth? If they re too busy to read about us anymore then I m afraid we ll (she gasps) then I m afraid I fear the worst. Tinkerbelle! Thumbelina! Come here at once! (Tink & Thumble enter S_ fluttering about madly. Their wings aren t fully developed all the way yet so they can t fly straight. They buzz around making the FGS impatient) FGS- Tinkerbelle? Thumbelina? What are you two doing? I m over here! Oh I m afraid I was right. It s beginning to affect us all. (Tink & Thumble finally arrive and almost crash into FGS giggling and laughing. They quickly compose themselves when they see the FGS glaring at them) 2

Tink (Curtseying) Terribly sorry Fairy god sister. Thumb (Curtseying) Sorry Fairy god sister. FGS It s ok, It s ok. Listen up you two. You need to have your wits about you now. We have a big job ahead of us. Something dreadful is happening across the land and we need to summon everyone together at once. (Tink and Thumbel GASP! and mutter in Fairy talk to each other very concerned) FGS FAIRIES! (Stopping them cold) Please listen! You must find everyone and bring them to Tairyhall as soon as you. We have very little time. I will do my best to help you but I m afraid my powers may be weakening as well. (FGS takes her wand and casts a spell over them quickly before she sends them on their way) FGS Zarzazee, zorzazee, zizzle and zower keep these two safe at least for an hour. Sound cue A Clock winds (Tink and Thumble buzz off in different directions all confused and silly then meet up laughing and talking in fairy talk Exit S_) FGS I must find a way to get to the bottom of this before it s too late. Before we all disappear (FGS Exits S_) Sound cue Scene 2 Jack (Off-stage Jack yells to his mother) But mom I told you they were magic beans. The man said they would work. (Jack enters S_ holding a pot without a plant growing. Looking down at his empty pot trying to see if anything may be growing he sets the pot down on the stage and looks at it) Jack I don t understand. It worked a few days ago. Just look at this one over here. Giant leaves, a thick full stalk growing straight down. The man said to place the magic beans in the dirt and say the words Fee Fyi Fo Fum in a loud deep voice and soon a great big beanstalk would grow tall enough for me to climb down or up. Well here it goes (Jack places the beans in the pot and stands back with his hands on his hips. He prepares for a grand performance) Fee Fyi Fo Fum (Jack scratches his head in bewilderment and tries again only this time much louder) FEE FYI FO FUM! (BEAT) This is bad. This is really bad. How will I ever get my golden goose if my beanstalk won t grow? (Little Red Riding Hood Enters S_ Whistling and skipping around with her basket. Jack doesn t notice her because he is staring at his pot intently. LRRH walks all around stopping at certain points to see where she s going) LRRH Hmmm this doesn t seem right (X to S_) Nope this isn t right at all. (X to S_) Hmmm strange this isn t right either. (Asking an audience member) Excuse me! But might you know the way to Grandma s house? I m terribly late already! (Person says doesn t know) Well I 3

know I ve gone this way before. Lets see from my gingerbread house I go over the river and through the woods but do I take a left or a right at the ancient beanstalk? Sound cue Wolf howling LRRH Jumping broomsticks! What was that? (She sees Jack and hurries over quickly to ask for help) Hi Jack! Jack Oh hello Red. How are you today? LRRH Something strange is happening here Jack. I can t seem to find my way to Grandmother s house and this warm apple pie I baked for her is starting to get cold. Jack That is strange Red. I didn t know you baked. LRRH Know not that! It s strange that I m lost! I ve been to my Grandmother s house hundreds of times over the years and today nothing seems to look quite the same. Jack I think your right Red. Something strange is going on. I haven t been able to grow a beanstalk all day. LRRH Hmmm What about trying a little miracle-grow? Jack Hey! That just might work! (Jack picks up his pot and is about to leave when Tink and Thumble buzz in and swirl about as they fairy talk) LRRH Tink! Thumble! What s wrong? Jack Whoa! I think I m getting dizzy! Tink Sorry Miss. Red but both of you need to come with us right away. The fairy god sister has called a meeting at Tairyhall and we must go now! Thumble Quickly! Quickly! LRRH (to Jack) This doesn t sound good. Jack (to LRRH) Maybe the Fairy god Sister will be able to explain why my beanstalk won t grow anymore. LRRH I bet she knows the way to Grandmother s house! (She starts looking around to see which way to go) Jack Come on Tink and Thumble, lets go. I ve got to try to get some miracle-grow for this beanstalk right away. (Tink & Thumble buzz off S_ wildly behind Jack LRRH remains behind not realizing everyone has gone) Sound cue Howling 4

LRRH Jack? Tinkerbelle? Thumbelina?(Worried and lost she runs off S_) Sound Cue Clock Chime I Music cue - Scene 3 (Big Bad Wolf enters S_ having the appearance of being a scary confident wolf. He struts about) Sound cue Growls (BBW runs and hides behind a large boulder on stage) BBW (peering out) Is the coast clear? Are you sure? I heard some pretty scary noises just now. (X to bench) Most days I could scare the beans out of the beanstalks in these parts of the woods. This is my territory. From the three little houses across the river all the way to Red s Grandmother s house just at the edge of the woods. I ve been the ruler of this forest for hundreds of years. Sound cue Howling (BBW gets scared and runs behind beanstalk) BBW What was that? (LRRH Enters S_ and stops over by beanstalk but doesn t notice BBW hiding) BBW (Sees LRRH) Ahh just the snack I was waiting for. (He attempts to scare Red) Whimper Whimper LRRH Hey there sweet little puppy. Are you lost little fella? Me too! Well I have to get to my Grandmother s house right away. Bye! (Exits S_) BBW (Annoyed) Little fella? Puppy? What s going on here? There was a time I would walk proudly through this forest. The trees would bow to me. Animals of all sizes would run and hide. Why they would be so scared their whiskers would curl round. I could HUFF and PUFF and blow all the leaves off the branches every winter. (Takes deep breath, tries to huff & puff but doesn t work) I used to feel strong and powerful and now I couldn t even blow out a candle. I guess I just don t have it in me anymore. Maybe I just need some rest. (BBW curls up next to large rock and falls asleep on stage) Music cue Scene 4 (Enter Cinderella S_ with a mop. She is humming the theme to snowhite s Hi Ho Hi Ho it s off to work we go as she begins to clean the forest she is unaware the BBW is asleep by the rock. She stops and checks her watch smiles and sweeps again. She stops a second time checks her watch again ) 5

Cinder Just five more minutes until I become a princess. I absolutely dread this part of being Cinderella. It s like waiting for life to begin each day. If only they wouldn t wait until evening to read my story. (Hums again) Hi Ho Hi Ho It s off to the Ball I go la la la la la la la Hi Ho Hi Ho If Miss White caught me humming her theme song in the forest why she d make me eat the apple (evil chuckle and cleans again this time the wolf) Cinderella & Wolf AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Cinderella Oh Mr. wolf it s you. Why you came this close to scaring me out of my slippers just now. BBW It figures Cinder What in Tairyland are you doing sleeping in the middle of the path in the woods? Shouldn t you be off chasing after Red of blowing down houses? BBW Well that s just it Cinderella, I don t feel like myself lately. Have you noticed anything strange today? Cinderella Well lets see I saw mice sewing a beautiful ball gown made out of curtains and a pumpkin turn into a carriage with four gallant white horses in front of it right before my eyes. (BEAT) Nope. Nothing unusual around here, everything is running precisely on schedule. Now if you ll excuse me, I am about to transform into the most radiant, the most beautiful, most attractive princess in all of Tairyland and I need my space! (Tink and Thumble buzz in S_) Tink Sorry to bother you Mr. Wolf, Miss Cinderella but you must com with us at once. The Fairy god Sister has called a meeting at Tairyhall and we don t have a lot of time. BBW Ok Tink, we ll be right behind you. (Tink and Thumble buzz off S_) Cinder Here, take this dirty mop with you (hands mop) and give it to the Wicked Queen. Tell her I m clocking out early. Today is a special day. There is spectacular ball being given at Tairy Castle and I must look perfect in order to impress the prince. Oh wait a minute (BEAT) this happens everyday! (She chuckles devilishly) Lucky me. (BBW stands starring at Cinder in disbelief) Cinder Well go on now! What are you waiting for? The moment is about to arrive and I do not wish to be seen with a filthy mop and a dog. (X-CS) BBW Great! Maybe I can get a job scarring mice away with a mop. (Exits S_) (Cinder stands CS arms open wide, big smile and ready to transform into the princess, she checks her watch) 6

Cinder Ahhh It s time! (Closes eyes takes deep breath nothing happens, opens one eye looks around, closes it and tries again nothing) (To the audience) Hey down there! Turn the page! What s happening? Why aren t I transforming into a beautiful princess? I don t understand, what if I miss the ball? What if I never become beautiful again? (BEAT) Fairy god Sister! Fairy god Sister! (Exits S_) Sound Cue Clock Chime II Scene 5 Music cue Wicked Queen (Off-Stage) Mirror Mirror! (WQ Enters S_ & X to CS and glares into mirror) WQ Mirror Mirror in the sky, who is more wicked of heart than I? (BEAT) Martha Stewart? Fine. I m still wicked though right? Because their have been a few extremely disturbing things that I have done today. Lets see Usually I make all the seven dwarfs whistle while they work. It s so much fun, but today after breakfast gave them all a paid vacation day and sent them home. Then there is that annoying couple, you know, Mr. & Mrs. Beast. Well, Mr. Beast has been under my ugly spell for years. This morning it was so beautiful out I decided to transform him into a handsome prince. Then there the worst happened. The most terrible, nauseating, most horrifying thing imaginable happened. In a moment of pure weakness I promised Pinocchio I would turn him into a real boy for his birthday. (Feeling flushed she almost faints as she tries to sit down on the bench) I must be under the weather (she looks around at clouds) (BEAT) Well clearly that not the case. There is something else at work here. Something very strange and I must not let it destroy my wicked ways. Why then I d become (sobbing) The GOOD QUEEN! (Screams) OH NO! (Pinocchio enters S_) Pino I m here! I m here! I heard you call my name Miss. Queen and I came as fast as I could. WQ I said OH NO! Not Pinocchio! Pino Well, is it time yet? It s my birthday remember? WQ Time? Time for what? (Looking in mirror making sure she is still wicked) Pino (excited) For me to become a real boy. You said you d turn me into a real boy today. WQ (struggles) I I I will do no such thing. You will remain just as you are. A wooden puppet. I was merely pulling you leg this morning. (Turns to go) Now if you ll excuse me I need to go make sure Sleeping Beauty is still sleeping. (Exits S_) (Pino is left behind staring at himself in the mirror) Pino What am I going to do now? How will I ever fit in with everyone else? If I were a real boy, why I could run and jump and soar through the air just like a Tairyplane. If I were a real boy no one would make fun of my nose. I would climb all the beanstalks and slide back down again landing in the giant enormous clouds. I would jump from cloud to cloud to cloud until I was so tired that I would fall down laughing. I would even be able to hide from Mr. Wolf behind this rock over here. 7

(Slides down to ground) I d be able to do so many wonderful things if I were a real boy. (Yawning and stretching) I would even be able to stretch. Well I guess I ll wait until my next birthday. (Pino falls asleep) (Tink & Thumble enter S_ - they buzz around not noticing pino they have a short conversation in fairy talk while pino overhears) Tink (Noticing Pino) Oh my! Thumble Oh my! Tink It s Pinocchio! Thumble It s Pinocchio! Tink & Thumble Wake up Pinocchio! Pino (wakes) Hi Tink! Hi Thumble! What s wrong? You look worried. Tink You must come with us right away Thumble Right away! Tink The Tairyhall meeting is about to begin. (Tink & Thumble whisk Pino off S_) Sound cue Clock Chime III Music cue Scene 6 (Fairy god Sister comes out carrying a scroll & Feather in hand) FGS I hereby call the Tairyhall meeting to begin. (Everyone files in except Red chattering about his or her problems) FGS Calm down everyone please! Is everyone here? (Goes down her list) Jack? Mr. Wolf, Cinderella, Wicked Queen, Pinocchio? Red...? Red? (Everyone looks around at each other confused) (Red enters S_ ) LRRH Now I know that Tairyhall must be around here somewhere. Everyone Red! We re over here! LRRH Ahhhh. There you are. I ve been walking for hours. 8

WQ Sit here dear. LRRH Hey thanks. WQ (shakes head) See Fairy god Sister. Did you see what I just did? We demand (BEAT) in a nice way to know exactly what s been going on around here. Cinderella Yeah! I m still waiting to turn into a gorgeous princess! Jack My beanstalk still won t grow! BBW I haven t scared anyone all day and I am starting to get a little nervous! LRRH Oooooo I wonder if I can get directions to Grandma s house off map quest. Pino I have a feeling our strings are being pulled. FGS Why is that Pinocchio? Pino Well earlier today in the woods I fell asleep but woke up to hear the sound of two familiar voices talking and laughing. Everyone Who? What did they say? Pino Well it was hard to make out at first but I thought I heard the words spell, parents, and believe. Everyone (GASP! as they all look out to the mirror towards the audience) Uhhhh!!!!! FGS (annoyed) Tinkerbelle! Thumbelina! Where are you two? Come here at once! (Giggling is heard off-stage then they buzz entering S_ laughing and giggling) FGS Have you two gotten into The Fairy god Mother s spell books again? Did you put a disbelieving spell on all the parents on the other side of the mystical mirror? Tink & Thumble Ummm Hummm FGS I knew it! Go straight to your cloud. (Tink & Thumble Exit S_) (Everyone chatters amongst themselves trying to make sense of what happened) WQ Great! So all you have to do is reverse the spell and we ll all go back to normal right? FGS I m afraid there is no way to reverse Godmother s spells. Everyone (starting to leave) Ohhh man What are we going to do? We re all going to disappear forever. FGS There still might be a way. 9

Sound cue Clock Chimes IV Hour up. Everyone Ohhh? How? What is it? FGS Hurry Tink! Thumble! Come out here, I need your help quickly. (To audience) Do you believe in us? (Audience answers YES!) FGS Then repeat after me. Zorzazee Zoo Zizzle and Zand I do believe in Tairyfale Land! Cinder I feel something! Beautiful! (Exits S_) Jack Look everyone my beanstalk is growing! (Exits S_) WQ Haaaa I feel the sudden urge to give Rapunzel a haircut. (Exits S_) LRRH Oh! Yeah! Now this looks familiar. Grandmother s house is that way. (Exits S_) Pino Fairy god Sister. I look the same but I feel like I can do anything. Run & Jump and FGS My dear Pinocchio you could do all those things before. Pino (realizing) I was always a real boy! (Exits S_) BBW (to Tink and & Thumble) ROARRRRR!!!!! (BBW chases after them off S_) FGS Thank you so much everyone! (BEAT) Don t ever stop believing in us and if you ever have any doubt, just open up a book and read it out loud! Music cue - Bows On Stage From Left to Right 1 Fairy god Sister 2 Pinocchio 3 Cinderella 4 Little Red Riding Hood 5 Thumbelina 6 Tinkerbelle 7 Jack 8 Wicked Queen 9 The Big Bad Wolf -Written by April Wells 10