Module 6: Break your heart laughing! Using humour in your Stories for Coaching Here s What You ll Learn! All about the funny story! When it s not funny Humorous Approaches Adding Play to Story Lightness & Energy Your Light, Energetic Story The Funny Story What is it that makes a story funny? Why do we laugh? What is the purpose of comedy in storytelling? How can it help us in our coaching? Everyone loves a good laugh and most people like to hear a funny story. These are the areas that it touches: To reduce stress/relieve tension Add a new perspective When we hear a funny story we are reminded that there are many ways to interpret a given situation and it may not be so bad after all! Hearing a funny story: We are endeared to the storyteller They seem more human, likeable and interesting It s easier to find common ground So, humor can be an integral part of the communication process and the building of a relationship. These are all critical elements of the coaching process. 1 OF 5
When we see humor in a situation: It reminds us to stop taking life so seriously To see the lighter side of things We may be able to find a previously un-thought-of solution Caution in Humor We need to be careful: Not everyone finds the same things funny Requires sensitivity to our clients needs Responsibility in terms of the issues we bring up Humor can slip into cynicism and sarcasm quickly With this in mind, we can use humor in a positive and powerful way. Humorous Approaches There are a variety of formal ways of approaching humor. We can access humor through performances (stand-up, comedians, recordings and life sessions), books, articles etc. The benefits of laughter are widely known and written about; this is an important resource for anyone in the Coaching profession. For example Laughter Therapy, Yoga Laughter, Improvisation and Playback Theatre In our coaching practice it is important to treat humor as an additional resource, another powerful item for our toolbox. 4 Step Approach to Adding Play to our Story Breathe When tension is high and a situation seems insurmountable; take a step away and breath deeply, and then again. If we are stressed we tend to breathe in a more shallow manner and that reduces our oxygen intake. Once we breathe in a 2 OF 5
deliberate and deep way, we start to de-stress and are able to find a different approach to the issue. Analyze Understand the root of the stress or tension; the feelings of frustration come from something specific. Understand what that is, suspend your selfjudgment and begin to accept that it is okay to feel what you are feeling right now, simply because you are feeling it. Reframe and Play the Game! Look at this situation from someone else s perspective; your partner, your colleague, your child, your parent. When you see it from their eyes, turn it into a role-play game and start playing. Role-play out the situation; give it a couple of different solutions or endings. Then do it again. Retell Your Story Introducing game and fun to the story makes it a whole different experience. Now tell your new story, it should be fun and light! What is the role of the journey in our stories? 10 Powerful Questions to Help Introduce Energy, Lightness and Humor into your Coaching and your Life! 1. What makes you laugh? 2. When was the last time you really laughed? What was the situation and who made it happen? 3. What are the ways that you can play out your tension and stress? 4. Who can you emulate or learn humor from? 5. Who are the people in your life that make you laugh most? 6. Think of a funny story you heard recently, did you laugh out loud, how can you incorporate this humor into your own stories? 7. Do you look for ways to laugh on a regular basis? 8. How do you feel when you laugh out loud? How does it affect your day? How does it affect the people around you? 9. Is there someone in your life who always makes you laugh? Do they know it? Do you make an effort to be with them on a regular basis? 10. Who do you make laugh? Why do they find you funny? How do you feel when you make someone else laugh? 3 OF 5
Lightness & Energy When we lighten up, we see an issue as less insurmountable, we release the tension that we have built up around the problem. This release of tension is positive energy, which can then be channeled into productive and positive action. Lightness through storytelling is all about the type of stories we tell, and the time that we choose to tell the story. We do this by using humor in story and being aware of the many stories that have a positive and simple outcome, a lightening up affect. For example Suzy was terrified that her baby would get sick. He had begun to cough and sneeze and she started to imagine that the cold turned into flu, and the flu into pneumonia. She started to worry about who would look after her other two kids while she took the baby to hospital. She was getting into a state. And then the baby sneezed again. Her 5 year old started laughing and said that the baby looks just like a frog! A frog, Suzy asked, why a frog? Her 5 year-old daughter started singing a song she had learnt about the frog that caught a cold but no one knew he was sick because he was already green! Suzy started laughing she really was worrying for no reason. She suddenly felt so much lighter! Your Light, Energetic Story What story are you telling? About your day or this moment or your business? How do you react when people ask you how things are? The story we tell ourselves can determine how light or heavy we feel about any given situation. We can change the story and the affect makes the situation much more manageable. Change the story and the reality changes! 4 OF 5
When we become lighter: We have more energy and that energy is a positive force We are living in the present, the here and now (the key to happiness!) When we allow laughter, energy and light into our lives we can make positive and long lasting change. 5 OF 5