SCENE 1 ((PG 6) Pirates are very bad people. Make no mistake. They rob innocent peasants. They ransack villages. They use terrible language. They sing bawdy songs hardly ever in tune. Yes indeed, pirates are bad people (pauses) I REY want to be one! SONG 1: PIRATES ARE WE SCENE 2 (PG 12) (unaccompanied singing and dancing like the pirates were) Pirates all are we! Pirates all are we! Avast! Pirates all are we! Pirates all are we! (getting irritated) Avast! Pirates aaaaaaaaalllllllllll are (with rage) Avast! Avast! Avast! That means stop it! (The stowaway notices that no one else is singing and all of the pirates are looking at her in disbelief. She stops, a bit embarrassed. ) When I say Avast you stop! Stop STOP! (a slight pause) Don t you speak pirate? No sir. No yet. But I plan to, for I, too, want to be a pirate just like you! (All Pirates Laugh) Redbeard Zebra You? A Pirate? You can t be a pirate! You re too small! You re too young Arr! You re too clean! but being a pirate is all I ve ever wanted to be. It s what I ve dreamed about ever since I was a child. (She attempts to show them what a quick learner she is) Watch! Watch this! (She lifts a very small cutlass) Avast! Avast! Avast, I Say! (All of the pirates laugh)
Yellowbeard Have you ever robbed an honest man? Rainbow Dalmatian Redbeard No. Have you ever been six months at sea without a bath or a shave or a shower? No. But once, I went a week without brushing my teeth! Ewwwwww! That s disgusting! Listen up, me bucko. Were on our way to the big pirate gathering in the big pirate sea and you ain t going with us and that s me final word. But but Arr! Be off with you now before we Season you up and feed ya to the fish (react, rubbing heads together excitedly) Ooooooooooooooo! Yellowbeard Belay that talk! It s time we sail. Throw her from the ship! Aye! Throw her from the ship! Aye! Throw her from the ship! (some of the pirates grab the stowaway and escort her from the stage. She is heard pleading with them on the way.) Wait! Give me a chance! I know I can do it! Purplebeard Move smartly men! Weigh anchor now and away we sail! Yellowbeard All hands on deck! Redbeard Hoist the Jolly Roger (they raise the flag) Up! Up and away! That s not pirate talk! (apologetically) Oh! You re right. So sorry. (tries again)aye! Aye! Away! That s better Aye! Aye! Away!
(During the instrumental section the stowaway sneaks back on sage in full view of the audience but not seen by the busy pirates. She hides in in a large chest) Fee! Fie! Foe! Fay! I smell the blood of a stowaway ARRRRRRRRR! Yellowbeard (quickly and idiotically) I don t know! I don t smell anything at all! Well maybe some of you, but I m sort of used to that. ARRRRRRRRR! Yellowbeard On second thought, maybe it s my allergies. Something does seem a little strange around here. Purplebeard Shiver me timbers! There s a stowaway on board! We have to find them Aye! A stowaway! A stowaway! Find him, ye sea dogs! Find Him! ARRRRRRRRR! SONG 2: STOWAWAY Tobi A Sidra H Petra G Elle B Samara G Ady F Noah Amon Taylor Kiduse Madison W Catch her! Don t let her get away Send her bones to davy jones Make her be you servant Be gone matey Make her walk the plank Stick her in a cave We have to make him pay Feed him to the sharks Hang her by her toes I want ice cream!
SCENE 3 (PG 21) Redbeard Arrr! We caught you now, ye scurvy dog! No ye be shark bait for sure! Aye! Make er walk the plank Purplebeard Toss er overboard All Pirates Arr! Feed er to the fish, the bubble blowing blaggard! Hey! Watch your language Oh, sorry. Got carried away, I guess Yellowbeard Belay, me addled hearties! Can t be makin this decision all by ourselves Rainbow Dalmatian Zebra Rainbow Dalmatian Aye! You re right, yellowbeard. This is a decision for you-know-who Whom? you know who Whom? you know who.. WHAT? WHERE? WHY? WHEN? Z, BB, D, & R (show pause, laughter)..how! All Pirates All Pirates THE KING OF THE HIGH C S THAT WHOM!!! Gosh ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh The of the High C s? Who s that? WHAT?! You don t know who the of the High s is? umm, fraid not.
Redbeard All Pirates Feed her to the sharks. The of the High c s is the craftiest crooner of the Caribbean coast. Aye! The swellest singer of the Swashbucklin Sea! Arr! The tastiest tenor from Tobago and Tahiti The of the High C s is a Singer? (with noses in the air an upper crust feeling) Precisely! Purplebeard Ye see, me squiffy, at the big pirate gathering in the big pirate sea, there is always a singing contest Rainbow Dalmatian (shocked) A singing contest? You don t know anything about Pirates, do ye? Aye! A singing contest! And all of the pirate ships put forward their best singers in hopes of winning the grand prize. What s that? Yo ho ho! It s a bottle of Yellowbeard (cutting him off) Sarsaparilla! Zebra All Pirates Blimey! Blimey spoken like a true pirate! Really?! NOT! (They all laugh at her) Can I meet him? Can I really meet the of the High C s? Meet him you will, ye scallywag! He ll be the one deciding your fate. And let me warn you, he doesn t take kindly to stowaways. Aye! Especially if ye can t carry a tune! Here he comes now. It s the of the High C s
SONG 3: of the High C s Sam W Ben M Cheveyo M And sounds great in a shower stall Some might say he is possessed I think it s all a bit absurd And smells like a refinery SCENE 4 (PG 29) No Beards (very pleased with himself and with a conceited attitude) Thank you! Thank you all! I am good, am I not? Aye Aye! Your Majesty, the very best (rolls eyes) Of course, I am! Aye, your majesty! But we have a bit of a problem here. What is it bluebeard? Well sir, it seems we have a stowaway aboard A stowaway? Shiver me timbers, this is not a problem. Send her bones to davy jones! Aye sir, but she says she wants to be a pirate sir. Oh really? Yellowbeard We tried to explain that she couldn t. We tried to tell her that the world could only stand one of you but (cutting him off) Avast! Where is this so called Purplebeard Here she is, sir. Right here. (two pirates lead the forward, holding her arms and legs) This? This is the one who wants to be a pirate just like me? Aye! More than anything. Your Highness! More than anything! Ahoy! Ye got to be kidding! Make her walk the plank! But sir! I swear I could be a smashing pirate, if only you d give me a chance!
Let me hear you say Blimey Blimey, Blimey, Blimey sir! Let me hear you say Arrrrrrrrrrrr (growling) (with gusto) Arrrrrrrrrrr! Not bad! SONG 4: You wanna be a pirate Michael G Luke H Zach G Can you swing a pirate-y cutlass? Do you know the stem from the stern? Can you plunder with one patch on your eye? Grace S and Kira N Can you grow a scraggily beard? SCENE 5 (pg41) (trying to say Arrr but sounding non-threatening) Arrg! Arrg! No G! no G! All Pirates (with gusto) Arrrrrrrrrrr! More AH! Less RRR! Ahhhhhhhrrrrr ( the arr dwindles pathetically) Avast! I ve heard enough! Mark her with a black spot and throw her in the brig with the rest of the prisoners But! But! To the brig!! TO THE BRIG! Instrumental Interlude They give the stowaway a badge that says Black Spot and take the stowaway to the brig where she is tossed in amongst a group of prisoner, all dirty and dressed in rags.
SCENE 6 (pg41) Prisoner 1 Prisoner 2 Prisoner 3 (in a sneering voice) My, My! What have we hear? Blimey! Looks like a stowaway. Aye! Looks good enough to eat Leave me alone! (teasingly) Leave me alone (Prisoners all Laugh) Prisoner 4 What are ye in for, mate? (The see the black spot) Prisoner 5 (horrified) Ahhh! The black spot! All Prisoners (in hushed awe)the black spot! Prisoner 6 Prisoner 1 Prisoner 2 Prisoner 3 What? What does it mean the black spot? It means you re marked marked for death. No! Yes! No! Yes! yes! No! All Prisoners What? Prisoner 4 Prisoner 5 Prisoner 6 The black spot means when the sun comes up and choir rehearsal is over, there s no doubt about it (slowly) Ye Walk the Plank! But how can that be? All I wanted was to be a pirate a pirate just like them! Ye should have stayed at home with ye mother, mate. Ye ain t no buccaneer!
Prisoner 7 Prisoner 7 Now your hours are numbered for sure, me hearty. And it won t be long til you ll be lyin in Davy Jones s Locker. Davy Jones Locker and remember All Prisoners Dead men tell no tales. But I m a girl All Prisoners Fine, Dead Women tell no tales. Here I am at sea where I always wanted to be. And Yet, I ve never felt so lost and alone in my whole life. SONG 5: Lost at Sea SCENE 7 (pg 48) ADDED SONG: Hey Ho, Nobody Home in 4 parts x3 Hey, Ho, Nobody Home Meat nor drink nor money have I none Yet will I be very, very merry Hey, Ho, Nobody Home No remember, mates! It s all about breath support! Breathe from your scurvied diaphragms! Aye! And don t forget round tones, me hearties! Round tone! Arr! We can t lose this year. Not as long as we ve got the of the High C s on out ide. (AD LIB) THAT S RIGHT! (singing an arpeggio, massaging his throat etc.) ah ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ahhhhh- Ah BEAUTIFUL! Thank you! Thank you very much! HIT IT! SONG 6: Singing a Pirate Song: 3 part at the end. Group 1 Pirates, Group 2 Chorus, Group 3 - Prisoners
SCENE 8 (pg 55) Yellow Beard If ya don t me me sayin so, Redbeard. I think you were singing a little flat! Red Beard No Beards Arr! Who you callin flat, ye good for nothing scallywag! (as before, sings his arpeggio) Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah (Then his glissando from low to high C) Ahh-hhh (but when he gets to the high note, his voice makes a terrible sound.) Blimey! What the matter,? Don t be messin around with us! Ay king! Don t be jokin. Tomorrow is the big day. You can t be losin your voice now. You re our ticket to first prize! (holding his throat, barely able to croak out a sound) Laryngitis! What? (still in a hoarse voice) Laryngitis! WHAT? (In a loud clear voice) I ve got Laryngitis, ye blaggards! How many times do I have to (hoarse again) tell you? LARYNGITIS? (IN SHOCKED AWE) BLIMEY! Purplebeard What are we gonna do? Rainbow Green Dalmatian Zebra Aye! What are gonna do Arr! There goes the first prize Yo ho ho, there goes our bottle of SARSAPARILLA! (sing in the distance) Lost at sea, lost at sea, tell me where I m meant to be. What was that? (still singing) hear my plea, set me free. Cause I m lost, I m lost at sea.. What was that? Why that s the most beautiful voice I ve ever heard.
Purplebeard Aye! And it s coming from the brig Redbeard The brig? Find out who it is! This might be the break we need. ( and bluebeard come in holding the stowaway) Aha and Ahoy! It s the stowaway! Tell me stowaway, was it you that we hear singing so melodiously? (sings) Lost at Sea! Lost at Sea! (forlornly) Aye sir! It was I! I guess I wasn t very pirate but I meant no disrespect! disrespect? That s the best singing we ve ever hear on this ship! (the king stomps his foot and clears his throat) Yellowbeard Aye! Mate! Like said, that s the best singing we ve ever heard on this ship! (the king crosses his arms in disgust) Rainbow Aye! Now you MUST go with us to the pirate-singing contest. With your help, I know we can win! Do you really think so? Well, there s one way to find out. Instrumental Interlude : Warm-up All pirates sing a scale: Do re me fa so la ti (they wait until the finally sings a beautiful high do DO! Dalmatian PERFECT! (hoarsely) Perfect (excitedly) Wow does that mean I get to be a full-blown pirate just like all of you? Well now, I don t know about that. (crosses arms stubbornly) No pirate! No Sing! Aye, mateys! Join me in a pirate huddle!
(All pirates get into a huddle. There is a lot of talking and mumbling with looking over their shoulders. Finally they all say ) ONE! TWO! THREE! BREAK! After much discussion, we have decided to ask you a few pertinent questions. PERTINENT? That s advanced pirate talk, ye scurvy dogs, for important Ask away! Do ye promise to never be lily-livered or ever say wow again? Wow! I mean AYE! I sure do! Do ye sear by you mothers honor that you ll honor the pirate flag? (saluting) Aye, aye, captain till me dying days! Do ye sear to be the heartiest, swashbuckling buccaneer ever to sail the sea Aye! Aye! Aye! Then by the powers vested in me, I proudly pronounce you a full-on, blow-medown, shiver-me-timbers, pirate of the briny sea. Yellowbeard Hip! Hip HOORAY! Yellowbeard Hip! Hip HOORAY! Yellowbeard Hip! Hip HOORAY! SONG 7: REPRISE - PIRATES ARE WE Bows Chorus, Prisoners, No-beards, Beards,, Set design, Stage Crew All