James Saylor # # Rainberry Drive. Mooresville, NC Dear James,

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1 1 Dear James, You have made some GREAT progress here in terms of your body content; you now have a start toward multiple good, specific, and obviously significant differences between your chosen book and movie. However, though your work is progressing well, you still have a little ways to go in order to meet the minimum outline requirements that will set you up well to write your essay. But again, do not be discouraged; you ve made good progress and are very close! Thesis: Your thesis argument is still not clear. Look at all the differences you note, and consider the unified outcome that all those differences cause. See all the marginal comments but especially the two yellow-highlighted marginal comments on your 4 th body paragraph for help with some ideas you already have that could lead you to a unified thesis argument that matches the content and differences you have so far. For example, if I was going to compare the Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince book and movie versions, my thesis might be: Due to several major plot, character, and setting changes in the movie Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, the film-version Harry is a much more realistic, complex, and interesting character than the book-version Harry, who is less realistic and more one-dimensional. As you can see, this sample thesis contains both main parts needed: 1) a list of the types of differences I ll discuss (plot, character, and setting), as well as most importantly 2) what I ll argue is the effect of all these different types of changes the movie made (i.e. the movie version of Harry is more complex and realistic, and thus more interesting, than his book counterpart). Do you see how this thesis asserts a clear, specific, and debatable point about the effect or significance of all the changes between the book and movie? Differences: Provide full context and evidence for all differences. Indicate who characters are assume your readers (of your essay) have not read the book or movie you discuss. Also, give evidence and specifics for all differences. For instance for the difference about how long Minny has worked for the Holbrooks in the book vs. movie, you must indicate how long exactly she worked for the Holbrooks in each version and give evidence from the book and movie to prove you are right about those differing work durations. For example: consider again the thesis from above (about Harry Potter). One difference I might discuss is that, in the book version, when Harry is in the tower while his Headmaster, Professor Dumbledore, is in trouble, the Professor puts a spell on him so he cannot move ( petrificus totalis ). This way, when Snape comes in to help Dumnbledore, Harry (who distrusts Snape) cannot make a decision to let Snape go up there or not. But, in the movie, the Professor does

2 NOT put this same spell on Harry, so it is Harry s decision to let Snape go up to the tower to help Dumbledore, which ultimately results in Snape killing Dumbledore. As you can see, I tell what the difference is, and then I would have to give info from the book passage showing that Dumbledore did put the petrificus totalis spell on Harry, as well as evidence from the movie that he did not (and why not). Analysis: Your analysis of each difference must prove your thesis argument. Once you know what you want to argue is the significance or effect all the differences have between your chosen book and movie, you must explain thoroughly for each difference why the difference causes the effect or significance that you claim all the differences overall DO cause. For example, revisit the thesis sample from about (about Harry Potter) and the difference I provided above. I would have to explain why Harry choosing to let Snape go up in the movie (instead of having no choice but to let him go up in the book) makes Harry more realistic, complex, and interesting in the movie than the book. For instance: Because Harry has long distrusted Snape but Dumbledore has always trusted Snape, the book version Harry clearly would have disobeyed Dumbledore, which is why Dumbledore puts on the curse in the first place. This shows Harry is just a one-dimensional character; he dislikes Snape, which means he will do so in all instances. However, in the movie version, because Harry has to make a choice (to trust Dumbledore s judgement and let Snape up OR to go against Dumbledore and go with his distrust / dislike of Snape), we see that Harry is a character who, like most of us, is very conflicted. We all have convictions, but we also sometimes second-guess ourselves. In this case, Harry having to make this tough decision is realistic and shows that he is a character of great complexity. Please note that the sample thesis, difference, and analysis here are meant as samples only. Please do not use these ideas on your revision (which would be impossible to do anyway, since you are writing on a different book and movie and should stick with your book and movie choice.) But I hope these examples will be helpful in showing you how to develop a proper thesis, as well as how to connect your analysis of each difference to your thesis (in order to prove your argument). Again, you are getting very close here, so keep up the hard work! If you have questions on this feedback or how to revise, please contact the school. Instructor (VGG) Penn Foster 2

3 3 I. Introduction A. Background information on topic ( The Help ) For decades, the film industry has adapted bestselling books into movies. Yet, screenwriting and filmmaking necessitate changes from the text of the book itself. The reason for this requirement is that films are more costly to produce and involve many more people and resources; therefore, they must reach a wider audience. Moreover, films must tell the story within a short period of time, keep the audience engaged, and do so in ways that both elucidates the original perspective and illuminates nuances or underlying tones that captivate the audience. These constraints were present when BLANK DIRECTOR made The Help into a movie based on the YEAR book by BLANK AUTHOR. B. Thesis Statement: Whereas some films differ widely from the books upon which they Commented [GGV1]: Good general info, but then lead into your specific topic the comparison of your chosen book and movie, not books and movies in general. are based, The Help written by Kathryn Stockett and the movie upon which it is based, Bboth use paradoxical narration, in-character narration, dialect, dialogue, black and white peoplecharacters, Commented [GGV2]: What is paradoxical about it? separate spaces and places, and historical memory to showcase the disparate social class institutions in the Deep South in the 1960s (Francois 1; Stockett Synopsis, Stockett Interview ). In both, self-empowerment, freedom from societal conventions in role and place, and even the maintenance of position play central roles. However, the idea that freedom comes only from changes inspired by the book publication and from private moments in private space between Tthe help and Skeeter is not entirely true. Rather, as evidenced more clearly in the Commented [GGV3]: This info belongs in the intro, not the thesis. The thesis must be a single sentence and must contain ONLY your own original ideas and wording. Commented [GGV4]: What? It is unclear what you mean to say here.

4 4 book, social order, degrees of personal freedom, self-efficacy and empowerment and even freedom from convention arise from the complexity of interactions in public and private space, courage, and from a willingness to tell the truth; so does the sense of belonging. II. Book Movie Comparison Body Paragraph 1 1st idea for the book difference Difference: In the book, the book idea comes from Abilene s deceased son through Abilene s recollection of his aspirations to become a writer. She conveys it so Skeeter when Skeeter confesses to Aibileen that her resumes and queries to the publishing company in New York have Commented [GGV5]: Your thesis is not clear. You have way too many ideas in one place, do not indicate what differences you ll discuss between your chosen book and movie, and do not indicate a difference in impact or significance between the book and movie. It sounds like you want to argue that the goals sought (freedom, etc.) are achieve through certain means in the book but different means (what different means) in the movie? But even if you clarify this statement, readers will still ask so what? What is the effect of the book showing one set of best ways to achieve freedom and equality and the movie showing a different way? You must narrow, specify, and clarify your thesis. Commented [GGV6]: Idea for what? To write the book? been unsuccessful. In the movie, Skeeter comes up with the idea for a book about what it is like for the Black maids to work for white families and contacts the publisher directly. The publisherclient relationship seems well established. Skeeter then approaches Abilene and asks for her help. Analysis of how the difference proves the thesis: Self-empowerment and freedom emanate Commented [GGV7]: Great point of difference, but state it more clearly up front. You are saying the book was Abilene s idea in the book but Skeeter s in the movie. That is definitely a significant difference. from this conversation in private space so does the interdependence of these elements extending from the unconventional personal exchanges. Aibileen realizes she can contribute to Skeeter s continued professional development and to Skeeter s freedom from the Deep South. After all, Skeeter questions the Natural societal order, when she once again experiences it after college Commented [GGV8]: This language is extremely vague and confusingly worded. Speak clearly and directly. Commented [GGV9]: Experiences what again? Confusing. (Blankenship 1). This exchange also disputes the commonly held belief that black women

5 5 were just maids, housekeepers and caregivers. Obviously, both parties took risks, especially in the age of Jim Crowe laws. Nevertheless, the book later written together twists the idea of a black man working for white men, as conceived by Aibileen s son. Body Paragraph 2 Character and Event Difference- Hilly Difference: Hilly s discovery of Jim Crow pamphlets in Skeeter s satchel and Hilly s reaction Evidence of Difference: In the movie, at Elizabeth s baby shower, Hilly notices the Jim Crow pamphlet in Skeeter's satchel. After Hilly finds Skeeter questioning Hilly s new maid about Commented [GGV10]: But is this the case in the book and the movie? You don t really analyze the point of difference here. The book has Abilene as the one who wants the book written and for what purpose? The movie has Skeeter as the one who initially wants the book written (and for what purpose)? Analyze why this difference matters. What do readers think about Abilene (and the black community at large) in the version where the book is Abilene s idea? What do readers think of the risk she is taking (and how great it is) when the book is her idea and she has to broach the idea with Skeeter? Conversely, what do readers think instead (about Abilene, Skeeter, black-white relations in general, etc.) when Skeeter is the one who initiates the book? Commented [GGV11]: Give context. Who is Hilly? Commented [GGV12]: Who is Elizabeth. being interviewed, Hilly asserts some power by stating that Skeeter should be careful because there are real racists in the community who could cause her some real trouble. In the book, however, Skeeter leaves her satchel at Hilly s by accident. Hilly discovers it and sees the Jim Crow pamphlets, notes on Hilly s bathroom initiative, and the notes from interviews that Skeeter conducted. Hilly telephones Skeeter to come pick up her satchel. Hilly has removed the Jim Crow pamphlets and made threatening notes on Skeeter s ; i.e., suggesting that Skeeter s boyfriend s father, a Senator, is against desegregation at Skeeter s alma mater. Analysis of how the difference proves the thesis: This suggests how deeply Hilly feels threatened by Skeeter and her actions. It suggests that Hilly s position in society is alternately threatened. This is why she reverts to bullying. Commented [GGV13]: Okay so, the difference is that Hilly seems well-intentioned / warning in the movie (but not necessarily against Skeeter s fight for equality for all races)? But she is antagonistic in the book / against equality? Unclear exactly what the difference is more context will be needed. Commented [GGV14]: In the book or the movie? You must explain the significance or effect in terms of the difference. In other words, if Hilly seems protective and not overtly racist herself in the movie version, what difference does that make vs. the book version (where Hilly outright bullies or threatens Skeeter and takes her pamphlets)? How does this difference cause readers vs. viewers to think differently about Hilly, Skeeter, the struggle for equality for all races in the 1960s, etc.?

6 6 Body Paragraph 3 Event Character Reaction Difference Difference: Hilly s social reaction to finding Skeeter s pamphlets Evidence of Difference: In the book, Hilly and her circle of socialites start to distance themselves from Skeeter. In the movie, this is omitted. Rather, the movie alludes to the circle knowing and disapproving of her actions, but this is an undertone. Analysis of how the difference proves the thesis: Social positions, degrees of freedom, and self-empowerment are tied to interpersonal relations. In this case, Hilly needs to maintain her social standing. She needs to distance herself from anything or anyone that threatens it. Commented [GGV15]: Okay they know and disapprove but don t do anything about it. So, the connection between these last two differences seems to be that the negative reaction from Skeeter s peers (Hilly and others) when they notice she is fighting for equality for black people is toned way down in the movie. But so what? What do you want to argue (in your thesis) is the overall effect or significance of all of these changes (in terms of relating to or how people think about characters, the story itself, the commentary on the fight for equal rights for black people, etc.)? Body Paragraph 4 2nd Character description and development difference Difference: Minny s employment record Evidence of Difference: In the book, Minny was not a long-time maid for Hilly Holbrook s Commented [GGV16]: Who is Minny? family as portrayed in the movie. In the book, Minny lost nineteen jobs because of her sassy mouth. Analysis of how the difference proves the thesis: This suggests how Minny s options for her personal life are limited. In both the book and the movie, her husband beats her because of this. It also proves the idea introduced in the book that white women hold the most power. They can Commented [GGV17]: Okay be specific / give evidence. How short a time had Minny been working for the Holbrooks in the book? How long had she been working for them in the movie? Commented [GGV18]: Okay so, do you think the message that white women / people hold power over black people (and why that was so upsetting / dangerous) was sent more strongly in the book vs. the movie (because the racist issues, risks faced, etc. were covered less in the movie)? All of your differences so far would seem to suggest this argument.

7 7 fire maids, cause them not to gain employment, cause the loss of maids homes, etc. Body Paragraph 5 Character Description and Development Difference: Minny does go to work for Cecilia but with dissimilar ends and results Evidence of Difference: In the book, Aibileen refers Minny to Cecilia and Johnny discovers her Commented [GGV19]: But this is portrayed in the book and the movie. It is portrayed better, more intensely, more meaningful etc. in the book vs. the movie? Your thesis will need to convey your argument, and then all analysis must prove your thesis. Commented [GGV20]: Who is Cecilia? Who is Johnny? Give context. in the house early on but asks her to look after his wife. In the movie, Minny hears Cecilia seeks a maid and gets the job. Johnny physically sees her bringing groceries and walks her into the house where Cecilia prepared a dinner for her. In both the book and the movie, they tell her she will always have a job if she wants it. Minny leaves her husband. In the movie, this is due to the forever job offer. In the book, it is because her husband beats her badly after her son loses his job because of her. Aibileen tells her to leave because of her job offer and the money from the book. Analysis of how the difference proves the thesis: Minny s freedom, her self-empowerment and Commented [GGV21]: Not sure what the difference is here, due to lack of context. self-efficacy are directly related with her job status and the circle of interpersonal interactions among Minny and Johnny, Minny and Cecilia, Minny and Aibileen and Minny and Skeeter. Body Paragraph 6 Character description / development difference Difference: Skeeter s writing jobs and Aibileen Evidence of Difference: In the book, Skeeter decides to take the job in New York, so Aibileen

8 8 can get the Miss Myrna job. Skeeter tells the editor of the local paper that Aibileen has been writing her column for Miss Myrna. Aibileen then gets the Miss Myrna job and earns the same ten dollars a week Skeeter earned. In the movie, none of this happens. Instead, Aibileen & Minny tell Skeeter she should go to New York because she will not ever get a man anywhere at home. A voiceover narrative of Aibileen talking about freedom and her becoming a writer airs. Analysis of the Difference: The omission from the movie with regard to Skeeter s decision and actions at the local paper suggest that the book would just change everyone s lives because it courageously told the truth with humor, sarcasm and narratives. In the book, the complexity of these interactions and the relationships engender personal freedom, some societal freedom, and freedom from convention. These actions not only empower people but initiate change. Body Paragraph 7 Event/development difference Difference: Book signed by everyone at the church Evidence of this difference: In the movie, everyone at the church signs the book and publicly honors Aibileen and Minny stating they know their names could not be listed as authors. In the book, Aibileen gives Skeeter the copy signed by everyone in the church and tells Skeeter that the reverend said Skeeter is part of the (church) family. Analysis of the difference: This demonstrates how shared history, personal interactions and the

9 9 totality of these can empower people collectively and individually. They can create ties across societal boundaries and thereby free all involved. The degrees of freedom are not merely related to societal rules. Rather they arise from courage, from relationships and personal realizations and a willingness to tell the truth. Key thought for conclusion- Whereas the film suggests Skeeter s willingness to submit the book for publication and Miss Celia s mastery of cooking under Minny frees the Help, the book version demonstrates how freedom interdependently arises from courage, from a willingness to tell the truth.

10 10 Works Cited Blankenship, Mark. "The 3 Unfortunate Differences between The Help (the movie) and The Help (the book)." The Critical Condition - Awesome Reviews of Movies, Music and TV. N.p., 25 Aug Web. 1 June < Francois, Dyane Jean. "Dyane Jean Francois: Film Review: How The Help Failed Us." Breaking News and Opinion on The Huffington Post. N.p., 14 Aug Web. 1 June < Help-Stockett-Book Reviews. LitLovers, Web. < Internet Movie Database. "The Help (2011) - IMDb." IMDb - Movies, TV and Celebrities. N.p., 15 June Web. 25 Aug < Maslin, Janet (February 18, 2009). Racial Insults and Quiet Bravery in 1960s Mississippi. The New York Times. 25 Jan Web. < Sondova, Amy. "The Help: The Book vs. The Movie (Spoilers? Probably.) Backseat Writer." Backseat Writer captivated by the backseat view. N.p., 15 Aug Web. 1 June <

11 11 Stockett, Kathryn. "The Help " New York: Berkley (2010). Stockett, Kathryn. "Synopsis Kathryn Stockett, Author of The Help." Kathryn Stockett, Author of The Help. N.p., n.d. Web. 13 June < Stockett, Kathryn. "Kathryn Stockett - An interview with author." Book reviews: Find the best new books. N.p., 5 Aug Web. 1 June < thryn-stockett>.