Following Directions Please read all the questions before you begin your test. 1: Write your name in the upper-right corner of the paper. 2: Write the date underneath your name. 3: Solve the following equation for x: 3x(9)=54 4: Find the subject and verb in the following sentence: Jake always remembers to speak. 5: Please write the longest English word you can think of. 6. If you don t already have it, get your textbook from your locker. 7. Write the name of your favorite sport 8. What is the capital city of France? 9. Ask a friend to borrow a pencil. 10: Come to the front of the class and write your name in English on the board. 11. Define the word: cat 12: Count to ten out loud. 13. Shake hands with someone on the other side of the classroom. 14: What would be an answer to How old are you? 15. Draw a picture of your favorite sport, food, and person 16. Trade pencils with someone else in the class. 17. Put your books under your desk or table. 18. Turn your paper over and trace, or outline, your hand. 19. Translate this sentence in your own language : Jack hits hard. 20. Define the word: jingoism. Now that you have read the questions, complete only questions 1 and 2 and sit quietly at your desk.
April Fool's Day April Fool s Day, sometimes called All Fool s Day, is on the first of April every year. People can play jokes. That s why you shouldn t believe what is said to you on this day. Someone may put a lot of chili in another s food or someone may say he is going to travel around the world in 80 days. Of course all this is done just for fun. When the trick is played people say April Fools. So, the others understand that it was just a joke. Some of the funniest jokes were on the media television, radio stations, newspapers,. For example in 1957, BBC showed some spaghetti trees in Italy. Many people called BBC and they wanted to know more about spaghetti trees. In 2008, BBC reported that some flying penguins were flying to the Amazon rainforest. Write True or False. 1. April Fool s Day is also called Fool s Day. 2. On this day, you should believe what your friends say or do. 3. After you play a trick on someone say April Fools. 4. There are some spaghetti trees in Italy. 1. F 2. F 3. T 4. F
April Fool's Day Expressions with "fool" 1) Match the first half (on the left) to the second half (on the right) to create expressions and proverbs related to fools. 1. A man who is his own lawyer 2. Fool me once, shame on you 3. A fool and his money 4. To not suffer. 5. To live in a 6. A fool may give. 7. Fools rush in. 8. There s no fool like a. fools gladly. b. are soon parted. c. fools paradise. d. has a fool for a client. e. where angels fear to tread. f..fool me twice, shame on me. g. an old fool. h. a wise man counsel. 2) Match the expressions above to their definitions below. a) To refuse to tolerate stupidity b) If a person tries to defend himself instead of hiring a professional, then he is a fool. c) Foolish people usually do not understand when a situation is dangerous, so they are not afraid to do things that frighten more sensible people. d) You shouldn t always trust other people s advice. e) To be happy because you don t know (or will not accept) how bad a situation really is. f) Foolish people make purchases without consideration; it is easy to sell something to a foolish person. g) After being tricked once, a person should be wary so that they cannot be tricked again. h) Older people are supposed to be more knowledgeable and have more experience; therefore, if an old person behaves foolishly then it is worse than a younger person behaving foolishly.
Answer Key: Exercise 1: 1. D 2. F 3. B 4. A 5. C 6. H 7. E 8. G Exercise 2: 1. B 2. G 3. F 4. A 5. E 6. D 7. C 8. H
Can you follow instructions??? YOU ONLY HAVE 90 SECONDS TO DO THIS TEST IN SILENCE! 1. Read all of the instructions 1-15 before beginning. 2. Write your answers in the table below 3. Write you name in Box B 4. Write the name of your school in Box J. 5. Calculate 12 x 6 in Box E 6. Draw 3 different size apples in Box A 7. Put a smiley face in Box I 8. Put the name of who your sitting closest to in Box D 9. Pat yourself on the back 10. Write the word you twice in Box C 11. Draw a circle around your name in Box A 12. Leave Box F and G blank 13. In box H write I can not follow instructions 14.Put your hand up when you have done all of the above tasks 15.Do only instructions 1, 2 and 3. Box A Box F Box B Box G Box C Box H Box D Box I Box E Box J
A HORRIBLE STUPID FUNNY JOKES 1. What do you call a very small mother? 2. What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? 3. What kind of umbrella does a teacher carry on a rainy day? 4. Why did the student sit on his watch? 5. Which fish have their eyes closest together? 6. Why are fish smart? 7. What two things shouldn t you have before breakfast? 8. What has 6 legs, 2 arms and 2 heads? 9. What goes up but never comes down? 10. What do you find all over a house? A. Time to buy a new one! B. So he could be on time! C. They swim in schools. D. A person on a horse. E. A roof. F. May (it only has 3 letters) G. A minimum H. A wet one! I. The smallest ones J Lunch and Dinner K. Your age L. There are more of them! 11. Why do white sheep eat more than black sheep? 12. Which is the shortest month? That s Stupid! I don t get it!? That s Dumb! Respond: That s Hilarious!!
B HORRIBLE STUPID FUNNY JOKES 1. What doesn t ask questions but must be answered? 2. Why is a river rich? 3. What follows a dog everywhere? 4. Why does a bull have horns? 5. What s black and white and red all over? 6. Which is faster, heat or cold? 7. What gets wetter as it dries? 8. What do you get after its been taken? 9. What s the best way to speak to a monster? 10. What must you pay when you go to school? A. Because it has 2 banks! B. Because its bell doesn t work! C. Heat. You can catch a cold! D. Your photograph. E. Attention! F. A tennis ball. G. A telephone. H. Its tail. I. An embarrassed zebra. J A towel. K. Politely. L. LemonAID.! 11. When a lemon asks for help, what does it want? 12. What do you serve but never eat? That s Stupid! I don t get it!? That s Dumb! Respond: That s Hilarious!!
C HORRIBLE STUPID FUNNY JOKES 1. What is the end of everything? 2. What is black and white and red all over? 3. How do you stop food from going bad? 4. Where does a gorilla sit at the movie theatre? 5. If the clock strikes 13, what time is it? 6. What word is always pronounced wrongly? 7. What can you make but can t see? 8. What s your new dog s name? 9. Why did Silly Billy bring a ladder to school? 10. What s the best thing to put into a fruitcake? A. A newspaper! B. Anywhere it wants! C. WRONGLY. D. I don t know. He won t tell me!. E. Your teeth.. F. 2 sides, inside and outside! G. The letter G H. By eating it! I. Time to get a new watch. J Noise. K. It was his first day of HIGH school L. He saw the salad DRESSING!! 11. Why did Silly Billy open then shut quickly the refrigerator door? 12. How many sides does a box have? That s Stupid! I don t get it!? That s Dumb! That s Hilarious!!
Answers for all A-B-C 1 G 2 - A 3 - H 4 - B 5 - I 6 - C 7 - J 8 - D 9 - K 10 E 11 L 12 - F