Kiss me, I am German! Or: Five Reasons why you should kiss a German

Transcription

1 Kiss me, I am German! Or: Five Reasons why you should kiss a German All rights reserved. Copyright 2013 Janosch Fingerhut 1. Edition July 2013 Cover design: Janosch Fingerhut Clipart from openclipart.org # words: ~ 3900 Dear reader, please take all these rhymes with a grain of salt. These are humorous words, so don t take them too seriously! The poems are gender neutral. They are valid for women and men. Happy reading! You can send me an if you had good or bad experience with kissing a German. Or if you don t know a German, you can kiss me. Just kidding. Here is my authorfingerhutj@gmail.com I advise kissing everyone. You should kiss the person you like. Race, colour, place of birth or religion does NOT matter. I wrote these rhymes for your entertainment and to show that we have humour. Happy reading!

2 2

3 Number One Nummer Eins With a wide and cute grin, you should kiss a German on the chin. With iron will and never weak, you should peck a German on the cheek. With a funny accent and never rude, you should snog a German in every mood. Why? What do you say? They have no humour and bath in beer? They go overboard and dress so queer? Their reputation is bad and they look so weird? And all think like the guy with the small beard? Let me clarify for you: Some of these rumours are not true. The only way to find out: You have to kiss a Kraut! Find a German, now, no matter who, there is no miss. Find a German, now, and kiss! So, you followed my advice? Next time don t think twice. Woman or man Young or old Let the story be told: Bernd or Sabine Hermann or Larissa We Germans simply are good kisser! 3

4 Number Two Nummer Zwei They come in every colour and size, having one is a real prize. They make good food and laugh out loud, having one should make you proud. Wound or injury, it doesn t matter, let a German kiss it better! Lonely or rejected, don t fret, let a German in your bed! With stamina and discipline, they make such encounters a win-win. All over you, all over you, they make your wish come true. This is way too much? No need for love and such? You don t need a German in your bed? Have you even kissed one yet? No? What are you waiting for, find one, or even more. Do it now, no matter where, find a German and kiss, right there! A long lasting meeting of lips, place your tender hands on hips. Make it unforgettable and loud, make it happen, kiss a Kraut! He or she, whatever your preference may be. Let hormones flow, let lips glow. Feel butterflies in your tummy, kissing a German is so yummy! 4

5 Number Three Nummer Drei They are clumsy and not clean? All they eat is potato and bean? They grasp countries they don t own? And forget they are not alone? If you answered yes to all above, let me bring peace, like a dove. Here is what you should do: Replace hate with love, break down barriers and prejudice, give them all a kiss! Grab a German, place your mouth on theirs. Try some intercultural affairs! Give a German a smack on their lips. Be grateful for these tips! Believe it when they say, affection for a German makes your day! All they re known for are cars, but in kissing they re real stars! Don t believe what you read here, only one way to overcome fear: Only one way to find it out: Face it! Place it, place your kiss on a Kraut! 5

6 Number Four Nummer Vier Berlin, Kassel, Westerburg, Munich, Kiel or Hamburg. You even find Germans abroad! On a plane, in a car, on a boat! Funny tourist, dragon slayer, busy doctor or football player. On the job or on vacation, a kiss is always a salvation. Language barrier? No problem at all. How do they say? Get on the ball! Full schedule? No excuse! Mingle among Germans and choose! Go ahead and add colour to your life, find a German husband or wife! No person for such binding? A kiss may support your finding. Heidelberg, Nürnberg, Wiesloch Bremen, Stuttgart or Goch. Go and get a smooch! No reason for such treason! I would never give them a kiss! Wait! Don t go and miss, miss your chance for your season! Your season of love and delight, kiss a German, they don t bite! A time of love and fun, come on, go and kiss, get it done! 6

7 Number Five Nummer Fünf They come in every height and shape, meeting a German is fate. They kiss in many different ways, some last hours, some last days. Fetch one now, keep them close, kiss their lips until you overdose. Nuzzle a German with your nose. Enjoy the one you chose! Warm outside or cold, kiss a German, young or old, During sunshine or even rain, do it, kiss one, it s a gain. A kiss = a sensual pleasure. Kissing a German = a real treasure! One for every situation, Germany, the kissing nation! Love in the airh..or not?!? doesn t matter, German kisses are hot! All we do in life is strive for bliss, The solution: Find a German and give a kiss! THE END! Thank you dear reader for reading it! I hope you smiled a bit! Nationality doesn t matter! So kiss the person you like! 7